Just Like You
by EveryKurtHasHisSam
Summary: Season 1 AU. Santana is Kurt's worst bully, but when Kurt discovers the reasons for the extensive torture, will he forget the past and help her during her time of need?
1. Some Nights

Just Like You

**Season 1 AU. Santana is Kurt's worst bully, but when Kurt discovers the reasons for the extensive torture, will he forget the past and help her during her time of need? **

**Okay, so with the phone call (and any in the future), to save time Blaine is in bold and Kurt is in **_**bold/italics**_**. Puck is in ****bold and underline font**** Okay? Good. **

Chapter 1- Some Nights

* * *

_Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck_

_Some night I call it a draw_

_Some night I wish that my lips could build a castle_

_Some nights I wish they'd just fall off_

_But I still wake up, I still see your ghost_

_Oh Lord I'm still not sure what I stand for, oh_

_What do I stand for? _

_What do I stand for? _

_Most nights I don't know anymore—_

SLAM.

I take my earphones out of my ears and reflect.

Sigh. Another locker shove. I think it's becoming a regular occurrence. They've become bored of throwing me into the dumpster, so they've decided to throw me against the lockers as a new, creative form of 'punishment'.

Punishment for being myself.

A witty retort bubbles on my tongue when it happens.

Another slushy to the face.

This time grape.

Grape's not too bad, I guess. The cherry ones are a bitch to clean.

Whatever. It just means another trip to the drycleaners. I'll just have to persuade Dotty, the owner, that I'm really clumsy with my food. I know she never believes me. She's too wise for that. She knows I'm careful with my food and that I would never let myself spill anything on my fabulous attire.

I wipe the grape out of my eyes and stare at my attacker. Blinking, I almost roll my eyes but then wince at the harsh sting that accompanies the gesture. Of course it's her. It's _always_ her.

Santana fucking Lopez.

She's only the second-in-command in the McKinley hierarchy, after Quinn Fabray, but she's the most vicious. She's relentless, has no motive and is always the timeliest with her attacks. Just as I'm heading to Glee Club. She knows that because she's headed there too.

I have no idea what made the Penis Princess actually _join _Glee club in the first place, but it's irritating because she's actually good. She's damn talented but she's my worst enemy. If only I know why she insisted on bullying me. I suppose it could be homophobia, but it's a well-known fact that her best friend Brittany Pierce is bisexual. She announced it once during a school assembly and backed it up by kissing Quinn on the lips. 99% of the guys and a large portion of the girls became aroused and everybody moved on with their lives.

Maybe she just doesn't _like_ me. Many people don't. Even if they're not homophobic, I'm not a very likeable person. Artie isn't a homophobe at all, but he's not my biggest fan for some reason. Maybe I'm too enthusiastic or full-on. Maybe I actually am the male equivalent of Rachel Berry. Oh no. Scary thought. Better move along.

After a clean-up and a change of clothes in the bathroom, I head to Glee. It's the best thing about school at the moment…and I'm late. Again.

I walk in as Mr Schuester is announcing the lesson plan. My eyes flicker to the whiteboard. Trios. I try not to roll my eyes. Fan-fucking-tastic. Another boring lesson plan. Seriously, is he ever going to learn that he needs to keep us interested and challenged? Will he every try a songwriting challenge? I have one already drafted with a skeleton score attached. I would win, hands down.

"Why are you late again, Kurt?" Will questions…again.

My eyes instinctively dart to Santana, who shakes her head shortly.

"I was catching up with Madame Belle about the latest French assignment as I needed her to check my draft." I lie impressively. It's become habit to lie to Will about my lateness. Just an ordinary day.

Or so I think.

I sit down in my usual spot on the outside of the front row. Everybody crowds around the middle of the front row, so I can sit without being disturbed by any New Directions drama. Well, that is until I hear a low whisper in my ear.

"Dude, she slushied you again, didn't she?" I turn around at the voice, seeing Noah Puckerman leaning over my, mouth close to my ear.

I frown falsely.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I lie for the second time today.

"Mr Schue believes your awful lying because he wants to, but I know better, dude."

"Don't call me dude." I interrupt.

"Anyway, Santana slushied _me _the other day for not having a good enough credit score. Now I know what it feels like. So I'm done delivering slushies to losers. It hurts too much." Puck continues. My eyes widen. Noah Puckerman, _the_ Noah Puckerman got slushied? Wow, that's rich.

"I suppose you want some sympathy." I scowl.

"All I'm saying is that I'm on your side. That bitch needs to be put in her place." Puck says.

"Are you suggesting an alliance, Puck?" I raise an eyebrow, sort of curious about what he wants to do.

"Sure. Just don't call me Puck. I'm not Puck anymore. It's Noah." I almost smile.

"Okay. Noah. You've got yourself an ally." I extend my hand which he shakes.

Folding my arms, I try to pay attention to the lesson when I see Santana snarling at me. Apparently, she understands what was going on and she's not pleased. Bitch, get off your fucking pedestal already. Her lip curls into a half-smirk and she faces the front, sass pouring out of her ears.

I roll my eyes at her reaction, but that's when Mr Schue looks at me.

"Kurt? Is there something you're not happy with?" He challenges me.

Maybe it's the confrontations with Santana. Maybe it's the way that I'm being treated in general. Maybe it's just the way I am. I don't know, but whatever it is, it doesn't gain me any points with Mr Schuester.

"You're damn right there is. First of all, trios. That doesn't challenge anybody. We all know that whoever teams up with Rachel or Mercedes will be stuck swaying and singing backup. I used to find solace here. But now it's a place filled with rivalry," I add in a little glance at Santana here, "hate and competition. I'm sick and tired of being undermined by everybody in here because of who I am. Yes, I'm not a baritone, I'm a countertenor. Do you even realise how many show choirs crave a countertenor in their midst. If I was at Dalton right now, I'd be getting every single solo they had. But I'm here, in the company of Rachel, Finn and co. Where only the favourites thrive. I love performing, Mr Schuester, but nobody wants to be a living, breathing prop."

I have no idea where that even came from, but by the snort coming from Noah behind me and Rachel's shocked look, I can ascertain that I did some good.

Mr Schuester just frowns at me.

"Kurt, you're dismissed from this session. Come back tomorrow when you've got a clear head and we can talk about your attitude. Now will you please leave?"

I raise my eyebrow. Whoa. Wasn't expecting that.

"Fine. It looks like this would be another chance for my contributions to be overlooked anyway, so count me out for the week."

"But Kurt then we'll have an odd number." Rachel whines to me.

"Whoops." I say, pushing the door open and exiting in more of a fashionable way that Rachel Berry could only dream of mimicking.

The door slams behind me and I storm away, too angry at everything to think clearly. I'll probably regret everything I said in there, but it had to be done. Every word was true. Truth is, I know the lead soloist from Dalton. He's only a freshman, but he's so damn talented. His name is Blaine Anderson and I met him at the Lima Bean when Santana poured her latte all over me. He helped me clean up in the bathroom. We got to talking and he said that Dalton clamoured for a countertenor. After he heard me sing, he assured me that if I ever went to Dalton, he would definitely have some competition for the soloist position. I don't think a move to Dalton is on the cards, but it's nice to know I'm valued somewhere.

I don't stick around after my exit. I drive straight home. My dad's at work, so I head downstairs to my basement bedroom and load up my laptop.

After browsing Facebook for a while, I get a message from Blaine.

**Blaine- **_Hey, how are things? x_

**Kurt- **_They've been better, I guess. x _

**Blaine- **_Want to talk about it? x_

**Kurt- **_Can I call you? x_

**Blaine- **_Sure, of course. Whatever you need x_

I shut my laptop off, smiling at Blaine's words. I sometimes think he could be the endgame I've longed for, and it could happen, I guess, but nothing has come up about it, so I leave it. Every time I think about just asking him out, I chicken out.

I dial his number (well actually, he's my first speed dial number) and put the phone to my ear.

"**Hey."** His voice greets me.

"_**Hey, Blaine." **_

"**You needed to talk? I'm all ears. Sebastian's gone out for the night. One of his conquests, you know?" **

"_**Oh god. I hope it goes well for him. Anyway, yeah I kind of needed to talk to you. It's just been a**_ _**rough day."**_

"**Santana again?" **

"_**Just a slushy and a locker shove, nothing new really." **_

"**Where's the poop, Kurt?" ***

"_**Seriously, how do you actually do that oh my god? You're so freaky. Well, I almost quit Glee Club. Well I voluntarily suspended myself for the week. I got tired with the favouritism and just Santana in general, so I quit for the week." **_

"**I didn't realise it was getting this bad, Kurt. You have any good news?" **I can hear Blaine's laugh ringing out through the call.

"_**Well, on a new development, I do. Guess who reached out to me, today? You'll never guess, Blaine." **_

"**Uh, Artie?" **

"_**No, he still dislikes me. It was Puck! Well, he's going by Noah now. Isn't that weird? He wants to form some kind of alliance." **_

"**Sounds like someone's hot for Hummel…" **

"_**Please, Blaine, this is Noah Puckerman. He's the biggest French whore of the all. Well, besides Santana, I guess. Her Lima Heights residence is the most visited place in all of Ohio." **_

"**Wait, Lima Heights?" **

"_**Yes, why?" **_

"**You won't believe this." **

"_**Wait, what Blaine?" **_

"**Take a wild guess at where Sebastian is tonight…" **

"_**NO. Sebastian and Santana? He's reached a new low. I thought he couldn't get any worse than the girl who had braided her pubic hair. **_

"**Ugh, she was tragic. But let's see how this plays out. This could be interesting." **

"_**I hope he uses protection." **_

"**Sebastian's always careful, Kurt." **

"_**I meant from Santana's rage. If he doesn't have shin protectors, then he'll be sorry tomorrow." **_

"**Oh god. I'd better call him. I'll text you later, babe?" **

Babe? What?

"_**Sure, sounds good to me. I'll pray for Seb." **_

"**Bye Kurt." **

"_**See you, Blaine." **_

I hang up and chuckle. Sebastian is screwing Santana. That's an image I don't want lingering in my mind. The rain falls rhythmically outside my window, pattering on the ledge that juts out from the outside. I curl up on my bed and close my eyes, for just a second.

Hours later, I shoot awake, my phone buzzing wildly beside me. Crap, what time is it? 8:30? Oh, shit. Blaine's calling.

"_**Hey you." **_

"**Have you been asleep?" **

"_**Maybe. Anyway, is Sebastian back?" **_

"**Oh sure. No 'how are you, Blaine?' or 'What have you been doing for the past four hours, Blaine?' Just Sebastian this and Sebastian that." **

"_**Blaine. Rambling." **_

"**Apologies. Well that's what I wanted to talk to you about actually." **

"_**Sebastian?" **_

"**Yeah. He and Santana didn't get busy." **

"_**He failed? That's certainly not like him!" **_

"**It wasn't a problem with HIM." **

"_**It was her? I knew it. Were there crabs involved?" **_

"**Kurt, she's a lesbian." **

"_**What? Oh my god." **_

Suddenly, it makes so much sense. Santana Lopez is a lesbian. She was closeted and she hates me because I'm out and proud and she's too afraid to be. This is…not what I expected, actually. A thought strikes me.

I whip out the Glee directory and punch in Noah's phone number.

"_**Noah, I have some info you'll be delighted to find out." **_

"**What's up, princess?" **

I laugh at the time.

"_**Well, little miss Lopez has more to hide than we thought. I happen to know her biggest secret." **_

"**Hit me." **

"_**She's gay." **_

"**What? Shit, are you serious? Wow, Lopez is a lesbian. Figures she hates you, though. But doesn't this make you mad?" **

"_**Why so?" **_

"**Because you can't get revenge? You can't do anything bad to her without outing her or going against your beliefs." **

"_**Shit, you're right. Noah, when on Earth did you start actually thinking about things?" **_

"**This took no thought to figure out. I'm surprised you didn't get there faster and without my assistance." **

"_**It'll be fun conspiring with you, Puckerman." **_

"**Same to you, Prissy Pants." **

"_**Well there's one I've never heard before." **_

"**You love it, Princess." **

"_**Goodbye, Noah." **_

I think back on Noah's words.

I can't do anything to hurt Santana without outing her or bullying her because I know her secret, something not unlike her behaviour to me. Hmm, this would require some major thinking.

On one hand, my heart goes out to her because I know how she feels. The other hand…well the other hand is busy sticking my middle finger up at her.

I know what I need to do.

I need to befriend her. She needs a friend, and I'm definitely one for bygones. I forgave Mercedes for busting my car window because she thought I was straight. I forgave Noah for bullying me in middle school. I can somehow forgive Santana for being scared and taking it out on me, right?

Right. I can do this.

I will do this. I'm a good person.

I make up my mind and fall back asleep again, feeling mentally drained, but ready for the next step.

* * *

**Author's Note: Just a new thing I thought of before. Hope you like it. **

**The song is _Some Nights _by fun. **

***This is a reference to the ongoing joke in _How I Met Your Mother_. It is used when somebody knows there's more to the story that somebody else is not telling. **

**Review, my darlings! Mwah xx**


	2. The Fear

Just Like You

**I couldn't help myself. The lack of Sam was driving me crazy, as I love writing him, so I had to add him in to this story. Enjoy!**

Chapter 2- The Fear

* * *

_I don't know what's right and what's real anymore  
And I don't know how I'm meant to feel anymore  
And when do you think it will all become clear?  
'Cause I'm being taking over by The Fear_

I start my day at school without another locker shove. I don't mind today, but I'm planning to do a good deed, so I'm a relatively good mood. I have the perfect entrance and the perfect timing. This is going to go well.

As the Unholy Trinity strut away from me towards their homeroom, I see Quinn look back at me, an apologetic smile on her face. Well, Quinn Fabray, I don't want your pity. Bitch please.

She turns back and begins a conversation with Brittany. I sigh and drag myself off to homeroom.

Mrs Wyatt stands at the front of the room, hands on her hips, waiting for the class to shut the fuck up. She is a very patient woman and she won't interrupt class discussion unless she needs to. For most students, her glare is enough to paralyse. She learned that from Coach Sylvester, I'm pretty sure.

"Okay, be quiet everyone." She tried feebly.

Nobody listened.

"ALL OF YOU, SHUT UP RIGHT THIS SECOND OR I'LL SUSPEND EVERY PERSON IN THIS ROOM FOR THREE WEEKS!" She bellowed loudly. The class suddenly quieted and turned to the front. She cleared her throat and turned to—holy shit.

Standing next to her, (how the fuck did I not notice this?) was possibly _the _most beautiful boy I had ever seen in person. Holy mother of Gaga, he's hot. That blonde hair (obviously manually dyed, but still), those beautiful green eyes oh my god. He's…breath-taking. Those lips…I can certainly think of some ways in which those lips would come in handy if you know what I mean. Wink. Of course you know. Every gay in the world dreams of those lips.

I realise I'm still standing and drawing some attention that could be spent ogling the new guy, so I sit down and smile when I look around me. The only spare seat in the room is the one next to me, like right adjacent to me. We would be touching elbows. Since this year, the school decided to replace the individual desk with dual desks, to increase group participation and social cultivation.

"Everyone, this is a new transfer student, Samuel Evans. He moved here from Tennessee and this is his first day so play nice. Samuel, if you'd like to take a seat over there next to Mr Hummel." Mrs Wyatt pointed to the seat next to me and fled the room, obviously having somewhere better to be. Samuel (Sam, I'm guessing) walked over to me as some stupid, ignorant jock decided to butt in.

"Watch out, Evans, it's contagious."

I roll my eyes and flip him the bird, glaring aggressively at him. Sam sits down and I turn to him and smile, finding myself flustered by seeing this boy up close.

"Hey, I'm Sam, but you already know that." He extends his hand, and I'm shocked.

"Didn't you hear? I'm contagious." I smirk.

"Honestly? I think the only contagious disease in this school would be ignoramus. You seem perfectly fine…"

"Kurt. Kurt Hummel. It's lovely to meet you." I take his large, outstretched hand and shake. He's good a solid grip. This guy is two for two.

"Awesome, I've never met a Kurt before. Are you named after Cobain?" Sam smiles.

"Funny you should ask that, because that's what my dad wants to believe, but my mother said that she named me after Kurt from The Sound of Music." Kurt blabbed.

"I love that movie! I'm a complete sucker for older movies. Roman Holiday has to be like the best movie ever."

"Oh my god, _finally_. Somebody else who has a decent movie taste. Audrey Hepburn is a goddess."

"I know right. Though I do have a soft spot for _Avatar_. I saw it like six times."

"Ugh, is that the three hour long feature about the blue people? It's like the sci-fi version of the Smurfs, I swear."

"I've read many critics views, but I've never heard that before."

"Well what can I say? I'm very unique." I giggle. Oh my god, I just fucking _giggled_. How annoying.

"You certainly seem it. Hey, my mom's having a housewarming get together with a few of her friends from her book club. Maybe you could make an appearance and save me from the discussion on Pride and Prejudice?" Sam suggests. Wait. His house. I've only known him for five minutes and he's already inviting me to a social event at his house? YES. I'm so in there.

"It would be a pleasure, Sam. Let me know when and where."

"Actually, give me your phone."

Frowning, I give it to him. He tampers with something and hands it back to me.

"My number's in there. Text me yours, you know, if you want." His smile is utterly intoxicating. Too bad he seems very, very straight. But then again, he dresses well, is well versed in Audrey Hepburn and old movies and he doesn't mind touching me. I suppose he _could_be gay. With a dyed hair job like that, it's not entirely out of the realm of possibility.

"Sure will!" I say a little too enthusiastically. The bell rings and first period begins.

"Where you off to now?" I question.

"Biology. It's not my strongest suit, so I just want to drop dead right about now. I'm gonna make a fool out of myself to my lab partner."

"Actually you won't. I'm in that class and, much like in here, the only spare seat would happen to be next to me. So, I guess we're lab partners!" I may be coming on way too strong, but I really don't care right now.

"Awesome! As long as you don't mind that I'm awful at Biology."

"That kinda works well, because it's one of my best subjects. I'm hoping to become a surgeon someday."

"That sounds…difficult. Ever since I saw how difficult it seemed on Grey's Anatomy, I kinda left that dream behind."

"Watching Grey's just made my dream stronger. People think because I'm in Glee Club and that I'm as gay as a rainbow that I want to be on Broadway, but people just judge on what they see and it's very, very off. Yes, I love performing but I want to help people, you know."

"I think a Grey's marathon is in order sometime. As long as you don't ship MerDer. Their portmanteau even sounds out 'murder'. It's such an annoying ship. Wait, you're in Glee Club? I have my audition after school today. Will you be there then?"

"I agree with that so much. But I won't be in Glee today. I got suspended for the week, well I suspended myself. It's a long story; I'll fill you in later. I hope your audition goes well though."

"I'm actually quite nervous. I don't know if I'm any good and I don't know anybody."

"Sam, if you're comfortable enough to audition, you're probably really good. We've never had a bad member of Glee Club and I'm almost certain you won't be the first."

"Thanks, Kurt. You're really awesome."

"Thanks! Just don't share that opinion with anybody else at this school. You'll lose friends faster than the time it took for your hair dye to kick in."

"I don't dye my hair, Kurt."

"Uh huh, of course you don't. And I'm totally straight." I roll my eyes and nod my head in the direction of the Biology lab. He follows eagerly. This boy is perfect.

"One piece of advice though? When you're accepted into the club, go and sit with the guy with the Mohawk. He's a pretty cool guy, despite how he looks. His name is Noah Puckerman and I think you'll go get along well together." I smile; glad to make Noah a friend that isn't a dick.

"I'll make sure that I do. Any other little pearls of wisdom you have up there?"

"The Latina, Santana Lopez." I think about my next words carefully. "She's a better person than she seems. She's troubled.

"Right. So should I watch out or embrace her?"

"I didn't think of that. She'll probably try and make out with you, but take no notice of her. Just turn her down. Even if you think she's hot, it's better for her if you don't go there." I say helpfully.

"Kurt…" Sam says but stops.

"Yes?" I'm confused. What's happening?

"Never mind. So let's get to Biology." Sam claps his hands together.

The rest of the day I spend pretty much glued to Sam's side. It turns out that we have the exact same schedule. So apart from Glee, I'll be with him all day. What an interesting development this is.

* * *

The school day ends and I put my plan into action. It's not an evil plan and I ran it by Noah at lunch. It turns out that Sam and Noah get on really well. Certain kinky thoughts rushed to my mind when they bro-hugged. I had to shake my head and cough to remove them. It would be hot, though. If either of them were gay…if only.

I scribble out a note and sign it, I don't know if that's a good idea, but I don't want it to be anonymous like something from Pretty Little Liars. That shit is messed up.

_Santana, _

_I know about you. I know I'm the last person you want to hear from, but I want to help you. I want to support you through this. I've been where you are. I won't tell anybody, I promise. _

_Kurt. _

I slip it through the air holes and walk away. Nobody sees me, but it's better to be safe. I'm walking past the choir room when I hear singing. It's Sam.

He's amazing.

_Well I've been searching for something true  
My heart says it must be you  
I'd love to fall and see it through  
But only if you told me to_

_Well I'd run through the desert, I'd walk through the rain_  
_Get you into trouble, and take all the blame_  
_I'd paint you a picture, write you a song_  
_And I'd do it all over if I did it all wrong_  
_I don't wanna steal you away_  
_Or make you change the things that you believe_  
_I just wanna drink from the words you say_  
_And be everything you need_  
_Yeah I could be so good at loving you_  
_But only if you told me to_

_I've seen a lot of good love go to waste_  
_And I don't wanna look back on these days_  
_Knowing all the things you'd never know_  
_If I never said a word and let you go_  
_I don't wanna steal you away_  
_Or make you change the things that you believe_  
_I just wanna drink from the words you say_  
_And be everything you need_  
_Yeah I could be so good at loving you_  
_But only if you told me to (yeah)_

_I don't wanna steal you away_  
_Or make you change the things that you believe_  
_I just wanna drink from the words you say_  
_And be everything you need_  
_Yeah I could be so good at loving you_  
_But only if you told me to_

_Maybe this is something I'll never be_  
_But I'll be right here till you tell me_

I marvel at his voice and smile when they accept him. Sounds like Finn has competition for the male lead. Well if Schue decides to heed my advice and recognise other talents in the room.

I scamper away before Schue sees me and drive home. I smile as I get a text.

**Sam- **_My audition went amazing. Noah recorded it so you can see it tomorrow. xx_

**Kurt- **_I heard some of it but I can't wait to hear the rest! You're amazing xx_

**Sam- **_Aw thanks, Kurt! I can't wait till you're back in there though xx_

**Kurt- **_Next week will be the best xx_

**Sam- **_Well it's time for dinner. I'll call you later? Xx_

**Kurt- **_Okay, talk to you later xx _

I put my phone down and hear a knocking at my door.

I trample downstairs and open the door.

"Hummel."

"Santana?"

"Can I come inside?" Her voice is soft and kinder than I've ever heard it before.

"Sure, Santana." I let her inside.

* * *

**Author's Note: So this is Chapter 2! Hope you all enjoy it! **

**The song is _The Fear _by Lily Allen. **

**Review please! It means a lot! xx**


	3. Cry For Help

Just Like You

**I realised that I didn't mention Sam's song last time. It's **_**If You Told Me To **_**by Hunter Hayes. **

Chapter 3- Cry For Help

* * *

We descend the stairs into my bedroom and Santana takes her first look around my bedroom.

"I gotta hand it to you, Hummel, your pad isn't as gay as I thought it would be. It's pretty decent." She nods her approval.

We sit in silence on my bed until her voice breaks it.

"So I got your note."

I gulp. Of course she did.

"How did you know?"

A take a moment's pause. Do I tell her the truth or revert to my usual guns- my 'gaydar'?

"Hummel. I want the truth."

"It was Sebastian Smythe. His roommate at Dalton is my best friend. He knew you were giving me some grief and he told me. His roommate, I mean, not Sebastian." I hope to protect Sebastian from Santana's wrath. She wouldn't go after Blaine. She doesn't know who he even is.

"Right. Well that makes some kind of sense."

"Why are you here, Santana? To silence me, because I already told you that I wouldn't tell anybody."

"I know. I read that part. I just needed somewhere to go and you're the only other person that knows besides Brittany and well her parents don't know so I couldn't go to her house."

"What happened?" I say, concern lacing my voice.

"My mom caught Brittany and I scissoring in my room. I thought they were going to be out. My mom called my dad and he shouted at Brittany to change and told her to never come back to the house again. I got dressed and well…they kicked me out."

I gasp, biting my lip. Does she—is she going to ask to live with me?

"So…uh….where are your things?"

"At ho-at the house." She almost says 'at home' but then realises it's not her home anymore. God that must sting. It's good that I'm not going to reject her, too. "My dad said that I can go back and get them tomorrow. First I've got to find a place to stay, then I can worry about my stuff."

Fucking homophobes. They make me sick. How can somebody just evict their child from their home just because she likes girls and not boys? It's pathetic. I mentally decide to go with her tomorrow and give them a piece of my mind.

"Santana, you can stay with me."

She looks at me like the thought never crossed her mind. "Why would you say that to me when I know you don't mean it? What kind of fucking sick joke is this? I'm leaving. I'll sleep on the streets."

"Santana, sit the fuck down."

Reluctantly, she does as I say.

"You're living here with me. I don't give a fuck whether you hate me or my dad says no, I'm not having you living on the streets on your own. Especially not in Lima."

"If I were you, I'd want to see me rot for what I did to you."

"Yes, you've been a royal pain in my ass. You've been nothing but a horrible, vindictive bully to me ever since we were 10 years old and you were in love with Sailor Moon, but this is different now. I could've so easily been you right now. Rejected and with nowhere to go. Those fears ran through my head a million times before I came out to my dad. The Glee Club already accepted me, so why wouldn't he? That didn't stop me from thinking, though. As far as I'm concerned, the past is irrelevant. What matters now is that you're in a position where you need somebody. Despite everything, you came to me. You have a home with me, Santana."

I'm just going to pretend like I have not just seen Santana Lopez crying. She'd probably deny it upon questioning anyway. She's tough, but not unbreakable.

"Okay, first of all, you shut your mouth about Sailor Moon. It was legendary and you know it." Somehow our rivalry had overturned itself. Now there was witty banter involved. "And second, thank you. I know I haven't been the nicest person to you. I can't excuse my behaviour but I can sure as hell explain it. You probably figured it out already but the fact that I'm a—". She sighs and bites her lip. "A lesbian changed everything. I was suddenly at risk of being rejected from school, society and evidently from my parents. I knew it since the last time I slept with Puck. Actually, the time I slept with Finn was pretty telling, but that could just be because he was shit in bed. But yeah, I know who I was as much as I tried to deny it, I couldn't. And then there was you. You were all out and proud. You were accepted by your family and by your friends. Sure, society doesn't like you very much for being you, but that'll probably never change. So it was my nature to hate you. Well I didn't hate you. I was _jealous_ of you. You had what I wanted. What I wasn't brave enough to reach out and grab. Wow, that sounds wanky. What I'm trying to say is that I only targeted you because I resented the fact that you have, well had, what I didn't. And I'm truly sorry for that. You know, I actually kinda like you, Hum-Kurt. You're a good guy."

I did not expect that to happen. Santana Lopez just poured her heart out to me and she actually seems really genuine. Wow there goes my rant about how much she hurt me in the past.

"I don't know what to say."

"Yeah, well if it's sappy then just save it for Evans, okay?"

"Sam?"

"Your laptop's open."

Sure enough, my laptop's open and she's been eyeing the screen for several minutes now without me realising it. A message from Sam lays open to her eyes on my Facebook homepage.

**Sam- **_Thank you for making my first day amazing, Kurt. I really appreciate it. Fancy getting some coffee on Monday morning before school? I'll pick you up? Xx_

I begin to blush and, while I'm distracted, Santana seizes my laptop and types an impossibly fast reply to Sam's message.

"Santana, what are you doing?"

"Hooking you up with a hottie. It's the start of my rehabilitation and proving to you that I can be trusted."

"You don't have to—."

"Shut your princess-hole, Hummel. It's already sent. Oh, and lover boy's typing."

"WHAT DID YOU SEND?"

"Sam, I'd love to get coffee with you Monday morning. Pick me up around 8? Then I put your address and two kisses. Sufficient?"

"That's…actually kinda perfect."

"I'm a genius."

A new message pops up and I snatch my laptop from her before she can hijack it again.

**Sam: **_Excellent! I look forward to it! Goodnight Kurt, have a nice sleep. xx_

I read the message aloud.

"Oh this is so perfect."

"Santana, he's straight, don't get any ideas."

She just looks at me like I've told her that Madonna is a brunette Asian man.

"Are you for real? You don't know that Sam's incredibly gay?! Tell me everything you know about him."

"Well, he shares my love of Grey's Anatomy and Audrey Hepburn…"

"Isn't that evidence enough? He also confessed to the Glee Club that he was thinking of a special PERSON when singing his song. Not girl, PERSON. He's a total flamer."

"Oh my god. And do you think he likes me?"

"Wow, for someone with a 4.0 GPA average, you're pretty damn stupid Hummel."

"I've never been in this situation before!"

"Really?"

"No! Santana, why are you smirking?"

"No reason."

I drop it, but I know she's hiding something quite important from me.

"Well my dad will be home soon. Are you hungry now?"

"I could eat."

"Excellent. You want me to whip you up some of my rather famous carbonara? It's heart-healthy!" I say, my enthusiasm for cooking weighing down the seriousness of the last hour.

"Sure."

After dinner, I make her some of my strawberry cheesecake, simply because I'm in a cheesecake kinda mood. I have a new friend and a possible boyfriend. This day is turning out pretty good. But then I think of Santana and how awful the day has been for her. Despite everything, my hearts goes out to her.

After we eat cake, saving the rest for tomorrow, I get a text from my dad.

**Dad: **_KURT. I WONT BE BACK UNTIL ELEVEN. COULD YOU SORT OUT DINNER FOR YOURSELF? SEE YOU LATER BUDDY. DAD. X_

I roll my eyes. My dad texting came with pros and cons. The pro is that I stopped him from using text speak and the con is his use of capital letters, even though I showed him how to revert back to lowercase. He must've forgotten. That's what I tell myself every time he messages me.

"Kurt?"

"Hmm?"

"I…uh…kinda have nothing to wear for bed."

"Oh. Oh yeah. Erm, I think Tina has something from our last sleepover that she left here. She seems about your size."

"Er thanks."

"You okay?"

"It's just really sunk in. I've been kicked out and I'm living with the boy that I used to bully. Are you sure nobody's filming us for some after school special?"

"I'm pretty sure. Though Warner Bros. are picking up my screenplay of this any day now."

"Funny. Seriously Kurt, I can't thank you enough. And you know I'm not the person to thank people, but you're doing me a huge solid with this. I'll repay you, I promise. First thing is getting you some man candy. Second is making you popular. It turns out that Coach Sylvester is in the market for a flexible, talented guy for the Cheerios. You interested?"

"Seriously? Me? A Cheerio? I don't know, Santana…"

"If Sam gets Quarterback next year, you could be the high school cliché you always wanted to be…" She trails off, not needing to say more.

"You're cute, Lopez. That's if Sam even wants to date me once he finds out—." I clap a hand over my mouth. I've said too much. I'll never tell anybody about…that.

"Finds out what?"

"I'm just…it's uh, a little bit of emotional baggage that's haunting me, it's nothing big."

"Kurt. We're probably going to end up best friends. As your best friend, I want to have your back. You can talk to me."

"Uh, maybe another time, but thank you."

"This isn't over."

When Santana finally curls up next to me in my bed, after she surprisingly picks _Moulin Rouge_ to watch (fall asleep to), I can't help but chuckle at the irony of the situation.

I lie awake once Santana drifts off and hear footsteps and the opening of my door.

"Kurt, you up buddy-oh." My dad stumbles in, his eyes widening at the sight of Santana.

"Kurt, I didn't know you were um…experimenting."

"No Dad! No! No! We're watching a movie. Can I explain it all in the morning? I'm kind of tired. It's been quite a long day and I'm really glad it's Friday today."

"Sure, just…uh…use protection."

"Dad!" I hiss, careful not to wake up the sleeping Latina who is currently snuggling up against my arm.

My dad leaves the room.

Before I try to go to sleep once I turn off the credits of the movie, I snap a picture of Santana sleeping soundly next to me. I want it for future blackmailing leverage. When she becomes bitchy, I can dangle it in front of her like an Oscar in front of Leonardo DiCaprio. I wipe a tear from my eye that appeared during _Come What May_ and snuggle up with Santana, closing my eyes and drifting off.

* * *

**Author's Note: So I'm aware that most of this is purely speech, but it was necessary. Next chapter will be the events of the Saturday. I think it'll be moderately long as it will have: **

**Kurt and Santana going to get Santana's things. **

**The explanation to Burt and Burt's reaction. **

**Some surprise news from Burt. **

**Kurt tells Santana his big secret. **

**So make sure to follow, favourite and review if you want this tomorrow! **


	4. Seven Devils

**WARNING. WARNING. WARNING: This chapter gets really quite dark and may contain triggers for rape and verbal abuse. If you feel you can't read for triggers, that's perfectly fine and just read the next chapters. You've been warned. **

**Also, Finn isn't as dumb in my story. He's darker, more selfish, but he's wiser and a little more intelligent and knows more things than canonical Finn. **

**And from here on out, the rating is being changed to 'M' because everything's going to change in terms of themes. More swearing, darker aspects and maybe even some smut, I don't know yet. **

Chapter 4- Seven Devils

* * *

I wake early Saturday morning, unable to sleep for long. Santana had spread herself across my bed like it's her own. I guess it is now…this is going to take some getting used to.

I sit at my vanity and check the time. 6:15AM. Fabulous. Just the early start I needed after a long, emotionally trying day like yesterday.

Hey life, give me a fucking break please. Sincerely, Kurt Hummel.

I hear some stirring upstairs on the main floor. No. Surely not. Burt Hummel is not awake before nine o'clock on a Saturday morning. Surely not. No way. That's not allowed to happen when I have important news that I need to gear myself up to telling him! Damn you, spaghetti monster in the sky! I mentally vow to wait until Santana wakes her fine ass up and then we'll go down together and let him know. She's already staying here, I know that, it's just whether Dad agrees. When I plead my case, he'll agree. His heart goes out to rejected homosexual teenagers. Once I say "That could've been me", he'll go right with it. I use scare tactics because I'm a feisty bitch.

Fifteen minutes later, the Latina taking up my bed stirs.

"Britt?" Santana groans sluggishly.

"I wish." I smile.

"Yeah, because you just wanna get on this." Wow, her recovery time is admirable.

"Sure, let's go with that."

"Bitch."

"You want some coffee?"

"That'd be nice, thank you." So polite Santana is going to take some getting used to. I almost expect her to snap some witty remark back at me, but it doesn't come. Why would it? We've made amends.

"Also, I was thinking we'd go upstairs and talk to my dad about the arrangements before we go and get your things."

"I dreamt about that, actually. We went and they had already thrown everything away and I had nothing and then you kicked me out and then I was starving on the street."

"Santana, that will never happen, I promise. We'll almost definitely fight a lot of the time about trivial things, but you'll always have a home here. As for your things, we'll get them. Don't worry. If they give you a time limit, I'll stall them. I'm pretty good at diversions. I'll just spill something or smash something."

"Is that before or after you rant at them about kicking me out? Yeah, I know what's going on in your mind, Kurtie."

"Please don't call me that." That hit a nerve. It was what my mother used to call me when she tucked me into bed or when I had a nightmare. To hear it from my (former) bully is gut-wrenching. She seems to get the message and nods her apology.

"Anyway, they won't take your rant too nicely, but I'm not going to stop from laying it onto them. Rainbow, you've got a backbone and I know you won't back down. I just don't have the energy to scream at them. Maybe later."

"Wow, Santana Lopez _isn't_ going to scream at someone? Did hell finally freeze over? Did Noah turn gay? Did Finn learn to dance? Oh my, I wonder if Rachel Berry learned how to dress?" I giggle, loving how easy it is to banter with Santana.

"Calm down, Prancy Pony. I'm embracing my nice side for once. And the day that Rachel Berry learns to dress will be the day you get a girl pregnant whilst saying that you hate Madonna."

"And that day will never come. I'm glad that we've established that she'll never learn how to dress."

"Not even if we both teach her."

I laugh and shake my head.

We traipse upstairs, giggling like little children and, as I suspected minutes earlier, my dad's already up. He has already made a pot of coffee and is sitting at the island reading the day's newspaper.

"Dad?" I call to him. He turns to us and smiles. "This is Santana Lopez and, if it's fine with you, she'll be living with us from here on out."

"Can I ask why we have a new houseguest?" He smiles and I think he's already on board. Santana puts a hand up.

"I can explain that, Mr Hummel." Wow, so formal. My dad hates that.

"Okay, but call me Burt. I hate that "Mr" crap." Called it!

"Sure. Well…Burt, the first thing you should probably know is that I'm a lesbian. I'm sure of who I am and I'm not sorry for it."

"Great. It's good that you know who you are at a young age. I'm proud of you."

"What, that's it? No "it's not normal" and "you're living in sin" talk?"

"Santana, my son is the gayest man in all of America. I've come to learn a few things about being gay and let's just say I totally accept you for being honest with yourself."

"I must protest!" I am not _the_ gayest man in America. Well, okay, maybe.

"Kurt, let's be real. Your favourite accessory is a tiara and you spend half your time watching Project Runway." My dad gets it spot on, as usual. Score one for Burt Hummel.

"Point taken. Go on, Santana."

"Okay. So I'm only here this morning because my parents didn't accept me and, well, they threw me out and told me only to come back to get my things and that I was going to hell."

"WHAT? They can't do that to their kid."

"I'm on it, Dad. No need to worry."

Dad looked more relaxed at the fact that I am going to deal with it. I know he would do something he'd regret in the future.

"So I'm going with Kurt today to get my things and then hopefully, you'll let me stay here. Kurt said it was fine, but I don't want to impose or push any boundaries."

"You're not. Santana, I'm angry as fuck about this and I'm not sorry. If Kurt would let me, I'd be over there in ten minutes giving them parenting lessons and shouting. Do you have any siblings?"

"Nope, only child. So you'd think they would appreciate me more, right?" She laughs shortly and realises nobody else is, so stops.

"As I was saying, you can stay. I'd encourage it, actually. You've always got a home with the Hummels."

"Thank you, Burt. That means more than you know."

"Thank you, Dad."

"But I do have one question, though."

"Shoot." I nod.

"Why haven't I seen you before? Kurt always has his Glee girls around for, what is it, "oatmeal facials" and marathons of Gossip Girl. What's your story?"

"I'm in Glee Club, but Kurt and I haven't really gotten along that well. I only came here because I didn't know where else to go and I knew that Kurt would understand what I was going through. I'll tell you straight up that I haven't been the nicest to your son, but I'm going to amend that. He's been lovely to me since I got here and I don't deserve it. I guess you two have that in common."

"It's nice to hear you being honest and I gotta say not many of Kurt's friends would be that straight with me. No pun intended."

We all chuckle before I interrupt.

"Well, we're going to get ready and go to Santana's house to get her things. Thanks, Daddy."

"Wait a minute, Kurt. I wanted to run this by you first and I guess now Santana since she lives here."

"Sure, Dad, what's up?"

"I've met someone."

My breath hitches in my throat and I'm suddenly seeing stars.

**Three hours later**

"Kurt, you haven't said anything since 11:00 when you asked if I wanted to borrow your eyeliner. Talk to me."

"I can't believe he's moving on from Mom." That's all I say. I haven't quite gotten over that fact just yet. And the 'who' of it all just makes it even worse.

"Let's break it down. Think about what your Dad said."

My mind goes back to that conversation.

**FLASHBACK TO THREE HOURS EARLIER**

"I've met someone."

"What? When? Why? Who?"

"Hang fire, Curious George. I know you're not the biggest fan of me moving on, but I think I'm finally ready to be happy. It's been nearly nine years, Kurt. I think I can finally do that now."

"Who is it?" I snap, being short when I don't mean to. I'll scold myself for that later, I just know it.

He sighs.

"Her name is Carole. Carole Hudson, her son Finn is in your Glee Club."

Carole. Hudson? No, no, no, life isn't that unfair. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU LAYING THE FUCK OFF, LIFE? THEN YOU GO AND DO THIS? NOT COOL, BITCH.

"No kidding." I roll my eyes.

"She says that you and Finn get on pretty well."

"Oh yeah. We're _besties_. Sincerely, I don't think I've ever been _closer_ to anyone than Finn Hudson. Really great, just spectacular actually. I'm glad you're happy, Dad." That's all I can manage. I run out of the room before Dad and Santana see me crying. Predictably, Santana follows me and spins me around.

"Kurt? Oh my God, come here." She pulls me in for a surprise hug.

"No, Santana, I'm fine honestly, let's just get ready and get the hell out of here for a while. Come on, I have a skirt you can wear."

**END OF FLASHBACK**

"Kurt?"

"Why her?"

"Carole? I don't know, but why is that such a big thing?"

I sigh. I guess I need to tell her.

"Okay, I'm just gonna pull over because I might need a hug after this."

"God, Kurt, what is it? It's Finn isn't it?"

"You're damn right it is. Okay. Here's what happened."

**FLASHBACK TO TWO MONTHS EARLIER**

"_Hey Finn, what's up?" _

_He looks at me noncommittally and nods. _

"_Bad day?" _

"_You have no idea." _

"_Want to share? I'm an excellent listener." _

"_Quinn's pregnant." He looks dark, angry. _

_I prevent my mouth from falling open in shock. _

"_How long?" _

"_A couple of weeks. But that's not even the worst part." _

_I click on to something and I think I know what's about to come. _

"_I'm not the father. She cheated on me with some bastard." _

"_How do you know?" _

"_We've never had sex, Kurt. She tried to trick me into thinking we did, but I'm not stupid. She just thinks I'm that dumb and that she can run circles around me well the joke's on her. She's knocked up and I'm single again." _

"_You-You broke up with her?" I've wanted this for a while, so why don't I feel happy? _

"_Don't try and act like you feel sad for me. You want me to be single, even if it means me being unhappy just so you can try and sneak your way into my pants because you have a gay thing for me. Remember, I'm not stupid. I know, it's obvious that you like me. You keep trying to flirt and the only reason you're even talking to me right now is because you think I'll fall for you or some shit like that. Isn't it?" _

_I don't answer him. It hurts too much that he's so accurate. Well, almost. I care about him and that's why I'm talking to him right now. _

"_ISN'T IT?" He roars, scaring me a little bit. I have half a mind to walk away, and that's what I do. Or at least try. _

"_Oh no, you're not going anywhere. You wanted to flirt with me and spend time with me? Well that's what you're gonna do. I need to go to football practice and tell Coach I'm not coming today. You're coming with me." _

_He grabs my arm and drags me to the locker room. He kicks the door open and easily suppresses my struggles to escape. I really don't like where this is going, at all. _

"_Coach Tanaka? Coach?! Huh, I guess he's not here." If I weren't a performing arts kid, I'd have believed Finn's attempt at naivety. I know he's just feigning surprise and that Coach was never here in the first place. In fact, nobody is. On any other day, being alone in a locker room with Finn would've been my dream. Hell, it has been my dream once or four times. But not like this. No, this is different. _

"_Looks like we're alone, Kurt? This seem familiar, this situation? You jerked off over this before, you little faggot?" He demands. I haven't. Honestly. But he won't believe me anyway. _

"_No." I say, trying to find some assertion within my voice, but it's a timid squeal. Even I don't believe my own voice. _

"_I bet you have. You've pictured me naked and fucking you in your little virgin asshole. You get off over me touching you like this, don't you? Yeah, you love this. Well, why don't I make you enjoy it a little bit more, considering everybody else gets to be happy except for me, huh? How about that, faggot?" _

_The word makes me flinch, and I'm mentally screaming for somebody to come and help. Even someone like Karofsky or Santana would do right now. _

"_Don't think about running. You'll get what you deserve for creeping on me. You don't seem to understand that I like GIRLS, Kurt? You don't seem to get that. Well maybe you need to be taught that lesson. The hard way." _

_Next thing I know I'm being slammed against the lockers roughly and pinned there. Finn releases me but blocks me with his body. This should be a fantasy for me. But it's hell. I know what's coming and I can't even stop it. If I run, he'll catch me easily. If I scream, he'll hurt me even more. What do I do? Think Kurt, think. My mind is blank and all I can feel is fear coursing through my veins. _

_Finn's hands fiddle with his belt and suddenly he's half naked. He whips off his shirt and presses against me again. _

"_This what you wanted? You like seeing me naked, don't you? Little pervert. Get down." _

_He pushes me down and I'm faced with his cock. No, not like this. _

"_Finn, I don't want to, I don't please just stop and let me go!" I scream at him, hoping that he'll listen to reason. _

"_You don't want to? Of course you do. You love me, why wouldn't you want this?" _

"_STOP." _

"_I don't think so, Hummel." My name coming from his mouth makes me feel so dirty. _

_He forces my mouth onto his cock and pushes it all the way into my mouth so I can feel it hit the back of my throat. I try to gag but he holds me head so I can't move. _

"_TAKE IT YOU FAG." _

_He releases my mouth and I blink the tears away. I can't handle this. _

_He spins me around and shrugs my jeans down to my ankles. Smacking my butt forcefully, he spreads the cheeks and shoves his huge cock right in there. The tears are coming thick and fast now and I'm sobbing, screaming for him to stop. But he won't. Of course he won't. _

_I feel wrecked. Broken. Damaged. I can't help but feel every moment when he pulls out of me and redresses. _

_He shoves me down to the floor so I'm lying there, naked and abused. _

"_Hope you enjoyed that, fag. Now stay the fuck away from me." _

_I feel dirty and I know that I can't tell anybody or else he might do it again. And anyway, who would believe the token gay kid who's in love with him over the star quarterback and ex-boyfriend of the head, yet pregnant, cheerleader? Nobody, that's who. _

_I'm all alone in this. _

**END OF FLASHBACK. **

I'm sobbing. Santana has her arms around my chest and my head is in her lap. I didn't expect to tell her at all, but I needed to get it out, especially with the recent news.

"The mother fucker raped you. That's why you've been weird around him in Glee."

I sniffle and eventually stop crying.

"I was so scared, Santana. I thought I was going to die. And all because Quinn slept with Noah."

"That stupid slut. Wait, Noah?"

"He's a changed guy, Santana. Ever since you slushed him, he's different."

"Hold it. Slushied him? I did no such thing." I can tell she's sincere.

"He said that you slushied him because of his poor credit score."

"I promise you, I didn't. Wait…hold up. Oh, never mind. I know why he's doing it."

"Spill the beans, Santana. After what I just told you, I think I'm owed some gossip."

"I'd love to, but I really can't. It's an elaborate surprise." She smirks. Oh god not more secrets.

"Anyway, let's get back onto the road."

"Yes, okay, but I'm driving. Your eyes are all red and puffy."

"Noted."

A while after we resume driving and Santana has expressed her rage about Finn, we arrive at her house.

"Kurt? We're here."

"Are you ready for this?"

"Honestly? No, how could I be? But I have to be. They don't want me here. I don't want to be there with them anymore than they want me living there." She spits.

She's brave. A lot braver than I am.

* * *

**Author's Note: So I've changed things around. Getting Santana things will be Chapter 5 because I wanted to get this bit up tonight so I could redraft Chapter 5 tomorrow. I've finished my exams for the year so I'll have more time to write. I'm still in college, but I won't really need to study for anything, so I have tons of free time. What did you think? As always, leave a review and I'll post the next chapter when it's done. As you've probably learned, I have no schedule for updates, just when I get them posted and edited. So it's 1:57AM and I'm posting this. REVIEW. **

**Next chapter will be Santana getting her things and Kurt giving them a smackdown. Come back when it's next updated won't you? Mwah, love you all. xx**


	5. My Final Goodbye

Chapter 5- My Final Goodbye

* * *

We're stood just outside the door of the Lopez house. Santana thinks it's a good idea if I introduce myself because she feels that they might just close the door on her if they see her. I can be charming when I want to be. Just gotta get my straight head on. When you're gay, getting homophobic idiots to listen to you is quite a difficult task sometimes.

With a breath, I knock on the door, steeling myself for what might come.

Mrs Lopez opens the door, confused as to who I am.

"Hello, Mrs Lopez, I'm Kurt Hummel. Do you mind if I have a quick word with you and your husband? It's about Santana." So much for going straight.

"Ah, okay, Kurt, come in. Is…is Santana okay?" Mrs Lopez asks, biting her lip.

I turn to Santana and nod.

She steps into the doorway, revealing herself to her mother.

"I'm okay, Mom. No thanks to you and dad. I'm getting my stuff and you'll-you'll never have to see my face again." It's clearly hard for her to get the words out. How couldn't it be extremely difficult for someone to leave home?

"Santana, please. We can talk about this, just let me get your father."

"I have nothing to say to either of you, I'm just getting my things. But I believe Kurt here has some things he'd love to discuss with you." Santana storms past her mother and sneaks off to her old bedroom to get her things. She said that she has suitcases in her room which she's using to pack everything.

I smirk at Mrs Lopez, who frowns.

"Could you please get your husband and chat with me?" I say, a sickly sweet smile forming on my face.

She just nods.

"Jose? There's a boy called Kurt Hummel who wants to speak to us!" She shouts, letting me inside.

"Hummel? Like the tyre store Hummel?"

"Yes, it's his son. He goes to school with Santana."

Jose Lopez sees me and his dislike for me is evident.

"Well, okay, dear. Kurt, why don't you accompany us into the living room?"

I nod and do so. This should be very…interesting. I plan to stall and give Santana as much time as she would need to collect her things together before leaving.

"Mr and Mrs Lopez…" I begin, but I'm cut off.

"Oh, call us Maribel and Jose, Kurt. That sounds much too formal for our taste."

"Uh, okay. Well, Maribel. Jose. First of all, I know about Santana's sexuality so there's no need at all to sugar coat that particular elephant in the room. I know because as you can probably tell by my…well everything, I'm as gay as you are rich." I comment, looking around the place. I remember Santana once telling the Glee Club that her dad was a doctor. It shows, it really does. I continue, not giving them room to interject.

"I also know that you kicked her out of this beautiful house where she has been living since she was a small child. All of those memories, gone just because she wants to be who she really is."

"I really don't think this discussion is appropriate." Jose butted in. Really, _really _rudely, I might add.

"Appropriate? Hell to the no. I refuse to sit here and have you tell me about what's appropriate. First you discover that your daughter is a lesbian. Fair enough, it's a shock. My dad wasn't shocked, but I'm a walking glitter-bomb. But Santana doesn't seem like the stereotypical lesbian. She's been with guys and she's been with girls. She likes girls. But you don't kick her out. You adjust. You tell her that you love and accept her anyway. Like any _decent_ parent would. It doesn't matter what you may think is deemed acceptable or right or normal or whatever," I'm ranting now and I cannot seem to rein it in. "You learn to deal with it because as confusing or whatever it is for you, it's hell of a lot more confusing for Santana. Your _daughter_. Does that word mean nothing to you people? Are you even listening to what I'm telling you? Santana is a wonderful person. You can tell I truly mean it because Santana has been nothing but awful to me. But I forgave her because she was just so _damn_ scared of you two rejecting her. And look what's happened. She doesn't have a home here."

They say nothing, so I continue. I think I hear a creak of Santana's footsteps on the bottom step, but I ignore it.

"Yesterday, Santana moved in with me. She found a new home. She came to me for advice and she gained a home. And it's a far more accepting place than here. Currently, she's upstairs right now getting the rest of her things together before she leaves and never sees you two again."

"How _dare_ you come into our home and say these things? Santana is not normal! And neither are you! In a way, I guess it's good that both freaks of nature are under one roof." Jose lashes out, seeming like he's just insulted me majorly. Wow. Try again. I wonder if he's even a Lopez.

"Is that it? Am I supposed to start crying because you've hurt my feelings? Well, guess what Jose, you haven't. I've heard plenty worse from much worse people than you, so nothing you can ever say will get to me. But Santana needed you. She's a strong person, but her own family telling her she's not welcome in her home is atrocious. It's situations like this that make me wonder why people like you are even allowed to be parents."

"I WILL HAVE NO MORE OF THIS." Jose said, rising.

"Sit the fuck down. Usually, I respect my elders, but with you I will do no such thing. You're a vile man and my bet it is that Maribel here had no say in Santana's departure. She seems like a lovely woman." I smile at Maribel, seeing the tears in her eyes at the thought of Santana.

"I will not have some faggot like you tell me what to do! Now leave this house before I force you out!"

"You will do no such thing." Santana has descended the stairs and drags her suitcases into the room. This wasn't on the itinerary. But yay, go Santana! Fight the power!

"Kurt has been more accepting of me in these past two days that you two and my abuela have in the part seventeen years. He loves me for who I am, not who he wants me to be. Sure, I'm not perfect, but I would fucking hate to be. But I'll sleep at night knowing the fact that I'm a far better human being that both of you. Mother, please stop crying. You may feel guilty now, but it's done. It's over. You could've done something when he kicked me out. But you just stood there. I needed my mother. And you let me down. So this is it. My last hurrah. My final goodbye or whatever. So, rot in hell, bitches." She says rather eloquently and rolls her suitcases out of the house. With one last glare at the Lopez's, I follow her, slamming the door for good effect.

When we've loaded her things into my Navigator, I notice her crying.

"Santana…"

"Just drive, Kurt. Please."

I nod silently and drive to my…our house.

We fill my dad in on the events and unload the Ben and Jerry's from the fridge. It's only mid-afternoon, but that's a perfect time to sit around watching movies with ice cream, right? We both need this after the day we've had. But Santana's healing process begins today. I start to wonder if mine will ever begin. I check my phone absent-mindedly and smile.

_Hey, how has your day been? Xx- Sam _

I start to think that my healing process begins with Sam. Only time will tell.

* * *

**Author's Note: Thanks for reading, guys. Not much to say in this note but OMG PLL. No spoilers, just PM me if you want to discuss stuff! **

**Also, next chapter will be a Sam/Kurt coffee date and a musical lesson devoted to a female artist. Guess in the reviews who you think it might be and I'll dedicate Chapter 7 to you if you're correct! **


	6. Don't Let It Pass You By

Chapter 6- Don't Let It Pass You By

* * *

Monday morning rolls around swiftly, much to my delight. It's two hours until my coffee with Sam. Santana totally thinks it's a date, but I'm not so sure. Nobody specified, really, whether it was a date. It was a Monday morning, the worst ever time for a date. Before coffee, I'll be grumpy and oh god, why did I even agree to this? Because Sam is amazing and possibly gay and I pretty much deserve a good boyfriend right now. Sam won't be put off by my Finn drama, well once I tell him which will be like ages away because I want to make sure he likes me (if he even does) properly before slowly unloaded my drama onto the baggage claim called Sam Evans.

I make sure to dress in my most amazing, Santana-approved outfit. I pack a second to accurately prepare for the probable slushy attack later on today. Santana is _sure_ that she'll be on the receiving end of her first slushy today, but I heavily disagree. Out lesbian or not, she's still _Santana fucking Lopez_. She's the HBIC now Quinn's pregnant and it will probably stay that way. Sure, once people find out that she's living with me, her status will go down some, but she'll intimidate everybody in fearing and loving her once again. She's just _that_ good.

As for Finn, she's said that she can't promise his safety, but I've asked her to stay away. He _cannot_ know that she knows. He'll…flip his shit. Instead of kicking chairs, he'll kick me. And I cannot have shoe marks on my Marc Jacobs. Santana says she'll fight for me, but to be fair, what can she do against a 6"3 football player with anger problems? Not very much, that's what.

I'm sat at my vanity, biting my lip. I have at least an hour before Sam is picking me up, but I can't help but think that I've not got enough time to make myself look at least a little presentable. Nothing is helping!

"Kurt, will you stop with the worrying, you look really, really good!" Santana remarks. Okay, maybe that helps a little. Santana's judgement counts for a lot in my book.

"But I want to make a lasting impression." I complain.

"He's already seen you! And he likes you."

"But he hasn't seen Monday morning Kurt." I retort.

"Just be your fabulous self and you'll be fine. I bet he kisses you today." I get excited at the prospect. My first kiss. But wait. Breath mints.

"SANTANA! Now I'm more paranoid about everything. I need to buy some mints or something." I paced around the room, looking for any breath mints that might be lying around.

"Got you covered." She throws a pack to me.

"You're a lifesaver. Thank you!"

* * *

Next thing, I know, Sam is knocking at the door. Luckily, my dad has already left for work and won't embarrass me or make Sam wet himself out of fear of my dad's shotgun. Santana winks at me and gets ready to go to school. I open the door and see him standing there, as beautiful as ever. And he's holding flowers! CUTE! Wait, so this is a date? I like his style…leaving me wondering and then silently announcing it to me when he knocks on the door. Genius. He's wearing a shirt and tie. Bless him. And he's also wearing that to school? Brave. I'm the only guy who ever thinks of dressing himself without traditional blue jeans or…even worse, those dreaded letterman jackets. Don't get me wrong, if Sam left his letterman jacket at my house one night, I would _definitely_ wear it to school the next day. It would be a mark of our relationship, if there became one, which I'm sort of definitely hoping there will be.

"Hey, Kurt!" Sam gives me a cute one-armed hug and presents the flowers to me. "These are for you!" I take a proper look at the flowers and what I see amazes me.

"Gloriosas! How did you come across these? These are only found in other continents! They also happen to be my favourite flower!" I babble. A guy that can procure Gloriosas for me is a definite keeper.

"My mom is an exotic florist. She gets so many rare and unique flowers. She's quite world-renowned for her floristry, actually. She let me have these." Sam grins, proud of himself. So he should be. He did well. I stop, making a sudden connection about Sam's name and his mother.

"Wait. Is your mother Mary Evans nee Holbrook?" I stop him, needing to know if I'm on a date with the son of the famous florist I'd been admiring the work of for years now.

"Uh yes, why? Have you met her before?"

"Have I met her? Are you crazy? Who even meets Mary Evans? She's one of my many world idols. Nobody else in Lima even knows who she is and then you come along all perfect and she's your freaking mother!" I gush. Wait, what did I just say?

"You think I'm perfect?" He blushes. Well now I've done it.

"So you're telling me that out of that whole rant, you only got the bit that was about you? Someone loves themselves…" I roll my eyes mockingly.

"And judging by your outfit, I would say that person was you. You clearly want to make people jealous of your crazy good looks." He shoots back. This guy is very _good_.

"Well I don't know about that."

"It's a compliment. Take it." I nod and ensure my flowers are immaculately presented and stored and follow him to his car.

* * *

After ten minutes of driving, we pass the turn for the Lima Bean.

"Sam, the Lima Bean is that way. Or are we going somewhere new?" I ask.

"Change of plans. I want to you meet my mother."

"I am _so _not ready to meet Mary Evans right now, Sam! Oh my God, I can't!"

"You can, relax. She's a normal person, just highly eccentric and enthusiastic about flowers." He laughs. His laugh is so musical. Glee Club will be good with Sam there.

"Well duh." I say lightly as we reach Sam's door. Pushing it open, Sam leads me to the lounge, where Mary Evans is sat _watching fucking television_.

"Hey Mom! I'm back. I brought Kurt here instead because well…I'll let him explain." Sam smiles at me, it's my cue. Oh god. What if I fall over? Wait, I'm standing still. It could happen! I'm nervous.

"H-Hello, Mrs Evans, um Mary, um Mrs Evans. I'm _such_ a huge fan of yours, you don't understand how crazy I am about your flower arranging and your "Flowers in Fashion" blog is a bookmarked page on my Google Chrome on my laptop!" I squeal, too happy to meet this woman. She's like I picture her before I saw her photograph. She has blonde hair down past her shoulders and piercing green eyes, much like her son's beautiful ones.

"Kurt, I would say it's so nice to meet the fans, but you're the first one to even know who I am. I'm a renowned flower enthusiast, but I'm not Beyonce. Teenagers like you don't recognise me at all! So thank you, Kurt. You're officially my number one fan. Congrats." She walks over to me and **OH MY GAGA MARY EVANS IS HUGGING ME WHAT DO I DO? **

"Can I just say how surreal this is? It's not every day that a guy meets one of his idols."

"I'm one of your idols? That is so precious, Sam you have to marry him!" Well that just made things awkward. I love you, Mary Evans, but way to make things tense between us on our first date. Well, if this still counts. Mary Evans beats coffee, so I say it does.

After some discussion with Mary and Sam about their life and Dwight, Mary's loving husband, we set off for school.

"Goodbye, Mary." I say, hugging her again.

"Don't be a stranger, Kurt. You're welcome anytime!"

"Thank you!"

"Bye Mom, love you!"

"Love you, Mary!" I risk. What am I even doing?

"Love you too, Kurt. Oh and you Sam." She winks, rubbing her son's shoulder and waving us goodbye.

We get back into Sam's car.

"So…that's my mom."

"Sam, your mother may just be the greatest human being on the planet." I rush.

"She's okay, I guess." I stick my tongue out at him.

"So, I know this doesn't count as the date I planned, but I figured you might have wanted to meet her instead. This means that I'll have to serenade you in Glee Club this week."

"What a shame that is…" I raise my eyebrow.

* * *

We get to school and we're a little late. Being side tracked by Mary Evans won't really hold as a detention excuse, will it? I guess not.

Glee Club is first anyway, so we just slip in as Mr Schuester is talking. Things might still be a little tense between us after my outburst. Santana is sat smirking at us. Everybody is downright confused. I forget that I've been enveloped in my little bubble for the past week and nobody from Glee has really seen me besides Sam and Santana. I'll fill Noah in later. Speaking of Noah, he's wearing those crazy eyes…oh no. The ones that I used to give to Quinn over He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. I know that look. Fuck, I _made_ that look. Well, along with Rachel. Wait but that means…_no_. Surely not. I think back to Santana's elaborate surprise comment. Puck is holding his guitar. No. No. No. I cannot do this! But Puck isn't gay. He's like 1000000% straight, right? Yeah, he's straight. He's singing to Quinn. Or to Santana, now he knows about her? I don't know, help!

Sam and I sit down at the back row and Mr Schuester addresses me.

"Kurt, welcome back and I hope you've learned when it's appropriate to address your concerns. That said, I have also thought about what you said and realised that you're right. I want to thank you for that. I'm so concerned with winning that I forgot what we're about. Acceptance. Equality. Glee. So this week, I'm assigning you all an artist lesson! I know you guys love these, what with Madonna week being a success and Puck learning that Madonna is not just a "MILF"."

"So who's this week?" Rachel pipes us.

"An artist who bloomed at a very young age. Writing songs before she was 16, performing with musical icons before she was 20. Writing and composing all of her songs from all of her albums. She's not necessarily a legend, but she stands for some good things and she's a good fit for this club. Any guesses?"

Everyone is silent. But oh my god I have it! She's my guilty pleasure artist!

"It's Avril Lavigne!" I burst out. Everyone frowns. They're clearly not happy with Schue's choice. But I love this lesson. I'm going to perform as many solos as I can fit into one week. Maybe one for all of the days? Is that too much? Nah, I'm just catching up since I missed the trios lesson.

"You're right, Kurt!" Mr Schue commends me as he writes her name on the infamous whiteboard. "So, pick an Avril song that corresponds with something in your life or just one that you like and sing it to everyone. As a solo."

YES. YES. YES. THANK YOU MR SCHUESTER. If Rachel and Finn sang I Love You to each other, I think I would've puked on my shoes

"Mr Schuester, if I may?" I raise my hand.

"You may." I step up to the floor.

"So, I've loved Avril since I bought her first album, Let Go. She's a huge musical inspiration for me. She showed me that you can change your image but still be the same person. She showed me that you can be whoever you want and nobody can complain if you're being yourself. So I'm singing one of my favourite songs from her third album. This describes recent events and people in my life. So I hope you enjoy it."

_Waking up I see that everything is OK  
The first time in my life and now it's so great  
Slowing down I look around and I am so amazed  
I think about the little things that make life great_

_I wouldn't change a thing about it_  
_This is the best feeling_

_This innocence is brilliant_  
_I hope that it will stay_  
_This moment is perfect_  
_Please don't go away_  
_I need you now_  
_And I'll hold on to it_  
_Don't you let it pass you by_

_I found a place so safe, not a single tear_  
_The first time in my life and now it's so clear_  
_Feel calm, I belong, I'm so happy here_  
_It's so strong and now I let myself be sincere_

_I wouldn't change a thing about it_  
_This is the best feeling_

_This innocence is brilliant_  
_I hope that it will stay_  
_This moment is perfect_  
_Please don't go away_  
_I need you now_  
_And I'll hold on to it_  
_Don't you let it pass you by_

_It's a state of bliss, you think you're dreaming_  
_It's the happiness inside that you're feeling_  
_It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry_  
_It's a state of bliss, you think you're dreaming_  
_It's the happiness inside that you're feeling_  
_It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry_

_It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry_  
_This innocence is brilliant_  
_Makes you wanna cry_  
_This innocence is brilliance_  
_Please don't go away_  
_Cause I need you now_  
_And I'll hold on to it_  
_Don't you let it pass you by_

_This innocence is brilliant_  
_I hope that it will stay_  
_This moment is perfect_  
_Please don't go away_  
_I need you now_  
_And I'll hold on to it_  
_Don't you let it pass you by_

I finish the song and collect my applause as I head back to my seat. Santana, Sam, Noah and Rachel (surprisingly) are all grinning at me wildly.

"Fantastic, Kurt! But that's not your final song of this assignment. I'm making this a showcase at the end of the week for all of your solos. We'll charge admission and raise money for costumes for Regionals! Next week we'll be holding auditions for the set list, by the way. There's a solo a duet and group number leads up for grabs so write your name down tomorrow and I'll organise the schedule of auditions! If nobody else has anything, I think that's it for the meeting. Have a good day guys, see you tomorrow!"

Sam turns to me as we walk out.

"Kurt, that was…breathtaking. I didn't realise you could sing like that."

"Every surgeon needs a soothing singing voice."

"It's too bad you don't want Broadway. Don't get me wrong, you'll be a great doctor, but Broadway could use someone like you." Sam compliments me. Again. I can certainly enjoy this.

"Oh, stop it you! You're too kind, too kind." I punch him on the arm.

We walk hand in hand to Biology, where we're lab partners. Yep, this is the state of bliss I think I'm feeling. I'm certainly not going to let it pass me by.

* * *

**Author's Note: So I could see going on for another 3500 words or so if I didn't stop, and I thought this was a nice place to do so. It's basically a two part chapter. Next chapter is the showcase...oh and an interaction between two characters which you do NOT want to miss, mmkay? I'll see you back here with the next update bros. Toodles! xxx *lessthanthreebitches***


	7. Let Go

Chapter 7- Let Go

* * *

The next day, Sam and I sign our names up for the different solo slots on the signup sheet. I sign my name in all of the boxes. Under the solo box, my name is below Rachel's, Santana' and Mercedes'. The duets include Rachel and Finn, Quinn and Puck, Mercedes and Tina and Sam and I. The group number's potential leads are Rachel (of course), Puck, Finn, Mercedes, Santana, Artie, Tina, Mike Sam and I. There's a lot of competition, but I think I have a good shot at one of them, at least.

"You think you'll get the solo?" Sam asks me, slinging an arm around my shoulders. I shrug.

"I don't know, it could go either way. I think Mr Schuester wants to give somebody else a chance, so I don't think Rachel will get it. Santana's the dark horse, though. Mercedes is obviously talented, but I think I can take her down. Santana and I are probably the frontrunners but I don't mind that. If Santana gets the solo, I wouldn't really mind too much. As long as Rachel doesn't get it, it'll be fine."

"I'm sure you will get it! You're too talented not to be showcased."

"Thank you, I'm sure you'll get the duet. Probably with Quinn or Tina, you'd sound great with either of them." I omit the fact that I want the solo and the duet with Sam. It probably won't happen though. I'll be lucky to get anything, though I have been practising my audition numbers like crazy for the past couple of months in case anything impromptu cropped up which need me to act quickly and sing something admittedly fabulous. I have three different songs prepared, each showcasing something different that I can do with my voice.

"I don't want to sing with them. They seem great and all but a duet for me wouldn't be a duet if you weren't singing on that stage beside me. But since as I think you'll be getting the solo at Regionals, if I get the duet, I might have to try and work someone else into my dream duet. Though it will only work with you by my side." Such a cutie.

"What's the song?" He's piqued my interest.

"You'll see. I'm using it for my audition for the group number. So what are you doing for your second Avril number?" He asks, clearly trying to change the subject away from his audition piece. I love how we can have such long discussions about music and song selections.

"That's unfortunately also a surprise. I'm keeping you on your toes. I'm performing last at the showcase though, so you can come out from backstage and watch it if you want. I coerced Mr Schuester into letting me sing last instead of Rachel, don't ask. What are you singing?"

"If you can't tell me, then I can't tell you. It's a secret."

"Well I know what Santana's singing and I know I'm going to cry."

"I'll bring tissues."

"You're a star." And he really was.

* * *

Hours later, I walk out of my Chemistry class feeling fulfilled. My dream of surgery is drawing ever closer and I just know that I'm going to love every single minute of the journey. What I know instantly that I'm _not_ going to love is the conversation I'm about to have with Noah Puckerman. He's lingering outside the classroom, seemingly waiting for me. His eyes catch mine and dart to his right, the direction he ultimately begins to walk in.

Reluctantly, I follow, sending a short text message to Sam telling him that I'm going to be a little late for our lunch date under the bleachers. I hate leaving him alone even now, but I have a feeling that Noah's conversation is important.

I enter the abandoned classroom and at once feel uneasy.

"Have you told Blaine?" Wait, what?

"Have I told Blaine what, Noah?"

"Don't act like you don't know what's going on." What the fuck is going on?

"Whatever, what have I or have I not told Blaine?"

"About Sam."

"Of course I told him. He's my best friend. I tell him everything."

"You really have no idea do you?" He says, staring me down.

"About what? You're being really cryptic right now."

"And you're being selfish." He snaps. Oh dear, what have I done now?

"How am I being selfish, Noah? Tell me."

"Because he's fucking in love with you! And there you are, clueless as you always are to everyone else, rubbing your new perfect relationship in his face. How is that supposed to make him feel, Kurt? You surely must've realised that he was head over heels for you! Sure, it may not have been that obvious at first, but then certain things must've alerted you to that the obvious fact that he's got a huge thing for you but maybe doesn't know how to tell you and now you're not available anymore he just feels sad and lonely like he has nobody." Noah rants. Where did _that_ come from? Oh. _Oh. _I suddenly get the feeling that we're not talking about Blaine anymore, but now is not the time to have this discussion.

"How…how do you even know? Blaine, I mean."

"I met the guy last week at Scandals. He was with that Smythe guy. He was going on about some guy that he really like and thought he was in love with and…he thought he had a chance because this guy liked him back because they spoke every night and were flirtatious and close with each other. Then Anderson got drunk and started asking Sebastian to call someone called 'Kurt' for him because he needed to tell him how he felt." Well, I know that's a lie. One, because Noah recited that as if it was scripted and two because Blaine _detests_ Scandals. Sebastian tried to drag him there a few months ago but he dryly refused, stating his distaste for the tackiness of the venue and the sleaziness of the drunken idiots there.

I put my acting skills to good use for once.

"Oh, oh my God, you're right. I…had no idea. Blaine loves me. Oh my God I have to talk to him about this."

"NO." Noah is adamant. Hmm, I wonder why.

"Is this because it's not Blaine that's in love with me, but _you_, Noah? And you don't want to tell me because I'm with Sam? You can't just make up things about my best friend and expect me to believe you. It's not right. You have feelings for me, talk to me about them. Sort them out in your head and then express them when you feel comfortable. Don't drag some other guy into things."

Noah shoved his head into his hands.

"God, you're right. I'm sorry. I was just scared. I didn't want to put myself out there to you just to be rejected when it makes sense to tell you anyway no matter what happens. I'm so fucking stupid. So fucking stupid." The breaking point for me is when I see Noah Puckerman _cry_. Scuttling over to him, I wrap an arm around him and rub his back, preparing for my motivational speech.

"Noah, you're not stupid. If Sam hadn't put himself out there, we wouldn't be together now. I was way too scared to even think about talking to him about something like that. I would've just left it hanging forever, afraid of rejection and judgement. After what happened with…Finn, you'd see where I was coming from. I'm honestly glad that I know now. Noah, you're beautiful. You are, it's undeniable. Relationship or not, I can safely say that you'll have no trouble finding somebody to be with. Gay guys everywhere are looking for somebody like you. You and Sam are quite alike. If the timing was right—."

"Please don't finish that sentence. It'll just hurt too much."

"Noah, you don't love me. I'm just the first guy you met since you realised that you were gay that is also gay. I'm the only option, so to speak. I'm the one that knows what you're going through and the one who understands you. I also have a fabulous wardrobe. But that's all. I highly doubt there are feelings involved."

"I guess you're right. I'm probably not _in love_ with you. But I definitely love you. I know that much for sure. You're inspirational, Kurt. The way you deal with the shit that's come your way is admirable. I just hope I'm strong enough to fight off the haters when I come out tomorrow."

What?

"Tomorrow? You're coming out tomorrow?"

Noah starts to sing "The Puck'll come out tomorrow." He nods and ropes me into a tight hug.

"And Kurt?"

"Yes?"

"If you ever tell anyone that I share d my feelings with you, I'll break your nose."

"You wouldn't do that. You like my face too much."

"Yeah, you're right. I love seeing you stick your nose up at the jocks. It makes my day."

"Noah, what Avril song are you singing?"

"My favourite one."

* * *

It's time. The showcase. I've been working on this song all week and I hope it'll pay off. It's a full house, surprisingly. I didn't think that many residents in Lima would be jumping at the chance to watch 13 high school kids sing a solo by Avril Lavigne, but I guess I was wrong. Mr Schuester appears at the microphone and announces the first singer.

"Singing a song that he's secretly loved since he heard it is Noah Puckerman."

I applaud with the rest of the audience. We're all in costume on the front row. We have to leave during the performance before ours to get ready for our own, so I can watch everybody's but Matt's. I'm excited to watch Sam's, but I'm dreading Santana's. She said it'll give her some closure, but it'll be difficult for her to actually sing emotionally. Instead of thinking of that to come, I focus of Noah. He's in his element. I don't know why he doesn't want to apply to a music school somewhere. He could definitely get in. Maybe with the right encouragement, he would consider it. I'll have to get Blaine on it, he'll know what to say to him to convince him. He convinced his parents that he was good and committed enough to apply to theatre schools, so Noah should be easily done for him.

"Hi, I'm Noah Puckerman and I'll be singing _Mobile." _

**Mobile by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Noah Puckerman **

**NOAH: **_Went back home again  
This sucks, gotta pack up and leave again  
Say goodbye to all my friends  
Can't say when I'll be there again_

_It's time now to turn around  
Turn my back on everything  
(Turn my back on) everything_

_Everything's changin' when I turn around  
All out of my control, I'm a mobile  
Everything's changin' when I turn around  
All out of my control, I'm a mobile_

_Start back at this life  
Stretch myself back into the vibe  
I'm wakin' up to say I've tried  
Instead of wakin' up to another TV Guide_

_It's time now to turn around  
Turn and walk on this crazy ground_

_Everything's changin' when I turn around  
All out of my control, I'm a mobile  
Everything's changin' out of what I know  
Everywhere I go, I'm a mobile, I'm a mobile_

_Hangin' from the ceilin', life's a mobile  
Spinnin' 'round with mixed feelings, crazy and wild  
Sometimes, I wanna scream out loud_

_Everything's changin' everywhere I go  
All out of my control  
Everything's changin' everywhere I go  
Out of what I know_

_Everything's changin' when I turn around All out of my control, I'm a mobile  
Everything's changin' out of what I know  
Everywhere I go, I'm a mobile  
Everywhere I go, I'm a mobile_

Wow. I did not expect that. Noah is actually amazing. Those vocals have improved and his musicality on his guitar is so much better that I wonder who's teaching him. He says he's self-taught and if that's the case he must've put so many hours in perfecting his playing, because he's come on a lot since I first heard him play Sweet Caroline all those months ago. That was before Sectionals, before everything flipped on its head. Before I met Sam. Before I befriended my worst bully. Before everything.

"Well I can safely say we're off to an amazing start, good job buddy," Mr Schuester nodded to Noah, "Alright moving swiftly onwards, next up is a song of self-expression by the newly discovered voice of Mike Chang!"

Have I missed something?

"Mike can sing?" I ask Tina, who's on my left.

"Yeah the trio's project really opened up a gateway for his voice. He has a wonderful voice." Tina seems distracted, but I can get to that later.

"Oh, I'm excited to hear this, then."

**Anything But Ordinary by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Mike Chang **

**MIKE: **_Hmm, hmm, hmm  
Hmm, hmm, hmm_

_Sometimes I get so weird  
I even freak myself out  
I laugh myself to sleep it's my lullaby_

_Sometimes I drive so fast  
Just to feel the danger  
I want to scream it makes me feel alive_

_Is it enough to love?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please_

_To walk within the lines  
Would make my life so borin'  
I want to know that I have been  
To the extreme  
(I feel)  
So knock me off my feet  
(I feel)  
Come on now give it to me  
(Ohh)  
Anything to make me feel alive_

_Is it enough to love?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
And leave me here to bleed  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please_

_Let down your defenses  
Use no common sense  
If you look, you will see  
That this world is a beautiful, accident  
(La, la, la, la)  
Turbulent, succulent, opulent  
Permanent, no way  
(La, la, la, la)  
I wanna taste it  
Don't wanna waste it away yeah, yeah_

_Sometimes I get so weird  
I even freak myself out  
I laugh myself to sleep it's my lullaby_

_Is it enough?  
Is it enough?  
Is it enough to breathe?  
Somebody rip my heart out  
(Somebody)  
And leave me here to bleed  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please_

_Is it enough?  
Is it enough to die?  
Somebody save my life  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please, ohh  
I'd rather be anything but ordinary please_

He's actually brilliant. Why would somebody hide a voice like that in a crowd of people? It's marvellous. It's certainly capable of lead vocalist material. Watch out, Finn, you've got Sam _and _Mike to contend with now. And myself, but you already knew that.

"Wow." I whisper to Tina. She's nodding, tears filling her eyes. Is there a story there that I've missed or something? I can't tell. I'll have to talk to Mike about his song and about Tina. I thought she was with Artie, though. Considering the way he's staring at us, I think it's safe to say that Tina broke up with him because of Mike. Are they together now? Does Tina have a crush?

"Alright, Mike, amazing work there! We definitely have to showcase your talents more. Next up is a hauntingly beautiful song by a hauntingly beautiful voice. Here's Miss Quinn Fabray!"

I'm curious as to what she's singing.

"Hi I'm Quinn Fabray and this song has meant a lot to me at certain points in my life.

**Give You What You Like by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Quinn Fabray**

**QUINN: **_Please wrap your drunken arms around me  
And I'll let you call me yours tonight  
Cause slightly broken's just what I need  
And if you give me what I want  
Then I'll give you what you like_

_Please tell me I'm your one and only  
Or lie and say at least tonight  
I've got a brand new cure for lonely  
And if you give me what I want  
Then I'll give you what you like_

_When you turn off the lights  
I get stars in my eyes  
Is this love?  
Maybe someday  
So don't turn on the lights  
I'll give you what you like_

_Emotions aren't that hard to borrow  
When was the word you never learned  
And in a room of empty bottles  
If you don't give me what I want  
Then you'll get what you deserve_

_When you turn off the lights  
I get stars in my eyes  
Is this love?  
Maybe someday  
I've got this scene in my head  
I'm not sure how it ends  
Is it love?  
Maybe one day  
So don't turn on the lights  
I'll give you what you like_

_I'll give you what you like  
I'll give you one last chance to hold me  
If you give me one last cigarette  
By now it's only in the morning  
Now that I gave you what you want  
All I want is to forget_

_When you turn off the lights  
I get stars in my eyes  
Is this love?  
Maybe someday  
I've got this scene in my head  
I'm not sure how it ends  
Is it love?  
Maybe one day  
So don't turn on the lights  
I'll give you what you like_

She's incredible, too. Judging by the way she was glancing at Noah, I'd say that she's singing about her pregnancy and the night of her daughter's conception. Was it love? Nope, Noah was gay. Maybe she still loved him, but he had clearly moved on. Does she know about his sexuality? It's kind of doubtful. Not even I could sniff him out and my radar is exceptional. I've only ever missed Sam and Noah. But they're two jocks. Jocks are rarely ever homosexual.

Most of the Glee Club is crying at Quinn's song. Noah is crying. Everyone but Rachel. Unsurprisingly, she's sat with her arms folded, waiting for her turn to shine. I've made a bet with Noah that if Rachel sings I Love You to Finn, he has to kiss Sam and let me watch. It's a serious bet. I want this to happen. I'll reassure Sam that it's fine for him to kiss another guy, especially if I'm benefitting. If she doesn't sing the beautiful song to Finn, I have to kiss Noah. A bet's a bet. Sam is fine with it. He's very honourable, he'll know that I'm just sticking to the bet. Nothing more. Noah's hot, but I've devoted my lips to Sam's now.

"Thank you, Quinn. Thank you showing me how far we've come in a short space of time. We've all matured and become better performers. Next up is the girl who once told me that she was Beyonce. Please welcome Mercedes Jones to the stage."

"Thanks, Mr Schue. And this song isn't relevant, I just really like it."

**He Wasn't by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Mercedes Jones**

**MERCEDES: **_There's not much going on today._  
_I'm really bored, it's getting late._  
_What happened to my Saturday?_  
_Monday's coming, the day I hate._

_Sit on the bed alone, staring at the phone._  
_He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no._  
_He wouldn't even open up the door._  
_He never made me feel like I was special._  
_He isn't really what I'm looking for._

_This is when I start to bite my nails._  
_And clean my room when all else fails._  
_I think it's time for me to bail._  
_This point of view is getting stale._

_I'll sit on my bed alone, staring at the phone._  
_He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no._  
_He wouldn't even open up the door._  
_He never made me feel like I was special._  
_He isn't really what I'm looking for._

_Na na na na na, we've all got choices._  
_Na na na na, we've all got voices._  
_Na na na na na, stand up make some noise._  
_Na na na na, stand up make some noise._

_I'll sit on my bed alone, staring at the phone._  
_He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no._  
_He wouldn't even open up the door._  
_He never made me feel like I was special._  
_He isn't really what I'm looking for._  
_He wasn't what I wanted, what I thought, no._  
_He wouldn't even open up the door._  
_He never made me feel like I was special._  
_Like I was special, cuz I was special._

_Na na na na na._

"All right, Mercedes! Nice job! Next up we have the song of self-confidence by one of our most diverse members, Miss Tina Cohen-Chang."

**The Best Damn Thing by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Tina Cohen-Chang**

**TINA**_: Let me hear you say hey hey hey_  
_Alright_  
_Now let me hear you say hey hey ho_

_I hate it when a guy doesn't get the door_  
_even though I told him yesterday and the day before_  
_I hate it when a guy doesn't get the tab_  
_And I have to pull my money out and that looks bad_

_Where are the hopes, where are the dreams_  
_My Cinderella story scene_  
_When do you think they'll finally see_

_That you're not not not gonna get any better_  
_You won't won't won't you won't get rid of me never_  
_Like it or not, even though she's a lot like me_  
_We're not the same_  
_And yeah yeah yeah I'm a lot to handle_  
_You don't know trouble, I'm a hell of a scandal_  
_Me, I'm a scene, I'm a drama queen_  
_I'm the best damn thing that your eyes have ever seen_

_Alright, alright_  
_Yeah_

_I hate it when a guy doesn't understand_  
_Why a certain time of month I don't wanna hold his hand_  
_I hate it when they go out, and we stay in_  
_And they come home smelling like their ex girlfriends_

_I found my hopes, I found my dreams_  
_My Cinderella story scene_  
_Now everybody's gonna see_

_That you're not not not gonna get any better_  
_You won't won't won't you won't get rid of me never_  
_Like it or not, even though she's a lot like me_  
_We're not the same_  
_And yeah yeah yeah I'm a lot to handle_  
_You don't know trouble, I'm a hell of a scandal_  
_Me, I'm a scene, I'm a drama queen_  
_I'm the best damn thing that your eyes have ever seen_

_Give me an T (Take me down and you will pay)_

_Give me a I (I just wanna hear you say)_  
_N (Now you can't go running round)_  
_A (Always give me what I want)_  
_Give me a YEAH (let me hear you scream loud)_

_One, two, three, four_

_Where are the hopes, where are the dreams_  
_My Cinderella story scene_  
_When do you think they'll finally see_

_That you're not not not gonna get any better  
You won't won't won't you won't get rid of me never  
Like it or not, even though she's a lot like me  
We're not the same  
And yeah yeah yeah I'm a lot to handle  
You don't know trouble, I'm a hell of a scandal  
Me, I'm a scene, I'm a drama queen  
I'm the best damn thing that your eyes have ever seen  
__  
Let me hear you say hey hey hey  
Alright  
Now let me hear you say hey hey ho_

_Hey hey hey_  
_Hey hey hey_  
_Hey hey hey_

_I'm the best damn thing that your eyes have ever seen_

Whoa, where the fuck did fierce Tina come from? I like her a lot.

I see Noah nodding. Clearly he feels the same. Mike is grinning up at her. Yep, there's a definite story there to be found. Artie isn't there. That's because he's next to perform. Hmm, I wonder what he's singing...something about Tina probably.

Artie is introduced and he takes centre stage.

**My Happy Ending by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Artie Abrams**

**ARTIE: **_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
So much for my happy ending  
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)_

_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
So much for my happy ending  
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)_

_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)_

_Lets talk this over  
It's not like we're dead  
Was it something I did?  
Was it something you said?_

_Don't leave me hanging  
In a city so dead  
Held up so high  
On such a breakable thread_

_You were all the things I thought I knew  
And I thought we could be_

_You were everything, everything  
That I wanted  
We were meant to be, supposed to be  
But we lost it_

_All of our memories so close to me  
Just fade away  
All this time you were pretending  
So much for my happy ending_

_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
So much for my happy ending  
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)_

_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)_

_You've got your dumb friends  
I know what they say  
They tell you I'm difficult  
But so are they_

_But they don't know me  
Do they even know you?  
All the things you hide from me  
All the shit that you do?_

_You were all the things I thought I knew  
And I thought we could be_

_You were everything, everything  
That I wanted  
We were meant to be, supposed to be  
But we lost it_

_All of our memories so close to me  
Just fade away  
All this time you were pretending  
So much for my happy ending_

_It's nice to know that you were there  
Thanks for acting like you cared  
And making me feel like I was the only one_

_It's nice to know we had it all  
Thanks for watching as I fall  
And letting me know we were done_

_He was everything, everything  
That I wanted  
We were meant to be, supposed to be  
But we lost it_

_All of the memories so close to me  
Just fade away  
All this time you were pretending  
So much for my happy ending_

_You were everything, everything  
That I wanted  
We were meant to be, supposed to be  
But we lost it_

_All of the memories so close to me  
Just fade away  
All this time you were pretending  
So much for my happy ending_

_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
So much for my happy ending  
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)_

_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
So much for my happy ending  
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)_

_(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)  
(Oh, oh)_

Damn, Artie has some serious rage issues building up about this. Clearly he's upset with Tina because he doesn't think that he did anything wrong. I'll have to get Santana to talk to him with me and let him know that he did mistreat Tina by being misogynistic and deflective.

Brittany takes the stage next and poises herself for an energy-filled number.

**Hot by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Brittany Pierce**

**BRITTANY: **_You're so good to me, baby baby_

_I want to lock you up in my closet  
Where no one's around  
I want to put your hand in my pocket  
Because you're allowed_

_I want to drive you into the corner  
And kiss you without a sound  
I want to stay this way forever  
I'll say it loud_

_Now you're in and you can't get out_

_You make me so hot, make me wanna drop  
You're so ridiculous, I can barely stop  
I can hardly breathe, you make me wanna scream  
You're so fabulous, you're so good to me, baby baby  
You're so good to me, baby baby_

_I can make you feel all better  
Just take it in  
And I can show you all the places  
You've never been_

_And I can make you say everything  
That you never said  
And I will let you do anything  
Again and again_

_Now you're in and you can't get out_

_You make me so hot, make me wanna drop  
You're so ridiculous, I can barely stop  
I can hardly breathe, you make me wanna scream  
You're so fabulous, you're so good to me, baby baby  
You're so good to me, baby baby_

_Kiss me gently  
Always I know  
Hold me, love me  
Don't ever go, yeah_

_You make me so hot, make me wanna drop  
You're so ridiculous, I can barely stop  
I can hardly breathe, you make me wanna scream  
You're so fabulous, you're so good to me_

_You make me so hot, make me wanna drop  
You're so ridiculous, I can barely stop  
I can hardly breathe, you make me wanna scream  
You're so fabulous, you're so good to me, baby baby  
You're so good to me, baby baby  
You're so good_

It's completely obvious who she's singing about and that's the moment that I remember the running order. Santana's almost up. At least she won't have to watch Rachel sing I Love You, which she is most definitely going to and I'll get my Sam and Noah kiss. How erotic does that sound though? Two muscled jocks kissing each other and—wait this is not the time. Rachel's about to sing. I meet Noah's and Sam's eyes and wink, knowing I've won this bet. Sure enough, I have.

**I Love You by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Rachel Berry**

**RACHEL: **_La La  
La la la la  
la la  
la la la..._

_I like your smile  
I like your vibe  
I like your style  
But that's not why I love you_

_And I, I like the way  
You're such a star  
But that's not why I love you_

_Hey, do you feel, do you feel me?  
Do you feel what I feel too?  
Do you need, do you need me?  
Do you need me?_

_You're so beautiful  
But that's not why I love you  
I'm not sure you know  
That the reason I love you_

_Is you being you, just you  
Yeah, the reason I love you  
Is all that we've been through  
And that's why I love you_

_I like the way you misbehave  
When we get wasted  
But that's not why I love you_

_And how you keep your cool  
When I am complicated  
But that's not why I love you_

_Hey, do you feel, do you feel me?  
Do you feel what I feel too?  
Do you need, do you need me?  
Do you need me?_

_You're so beautiful  
But that's not why I love you  
And I'm not sure you know  
That the reason I love you_

_Is you being you, just you  
Yeah, the reason I love you  
Is all that we've been through  
And that's why I love you_

_Even though we didn't make it through  
I am always here for you, you_

_You're so beautiful  
But that's not why I love you  
I'm not sure you know  
That the reason I love you_

_Is you being you, just you  
Yeah, the reason I love you  
Is all that we've been through  
And that's why I love you_

_That's why I love you  
That's why I love you  
That's why I love you_

I win. I glance over to the boys. Noah is smirking, even though he lost, he still gets a reward. Sam is smiling too, and actually looks quite enthused about the fact that he has to kiss Noah. Why wouldn't he be? Noah's a hot piece of action. Sam's model material. And I get to watch. This makes me too happy, I'm so pathetic. Ugh. I guess this is a way of gearing myself up to watching Santana's performance. This is going to be emotional. Sam passes me some tissues and I smile gratefully at him. He subtly swaps seats with Tina during the small break between Rachel and Santana and slings his arm around me. I'm not ready to watch her heart break whilst singing. It'll have just hit her and then she has to sing about it? I guess it could help her, though.

"Hello everyone. I'm Santana Lopez and this song is an expression of some recent events which have transpired in the most unfortunate circumstances. Though out of this, I've gained something truly valuable. This song is for my parents. And for Kurt."

Oh god. Dear Lord, no. Just let this be over please.

**Nobody's Home by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Santana Lopez**

**SANTANA: **_Well, I couldn't tell you  
Why she felt that way  
She felt it every day_

_And I couldn't help her  
I just watched her make  
The same mistakes again_

_What's wrong, what's wrong now?  
Too many, too many problems  
Don't know where she belongs  
Where she belongs_

_She wants to go home  
But nobody's home  
That's where she lies  
Broken inside_

_With no place to go  
No place to go  
To dry her eyes  
Broken inside_

_Open your eyes  
And look outside  
Find the reasons why_

_You've been rejected  
And now you can't find  
What you've left behind_

_Be strong, be strong now  
Too many, too many problems  
Don't know where she belongs  
Where she belongs_

_She wants to go home  
But nobody's home  
That's where she lies  
Broken inside_

_With no place to go  
No place to go  
To dry her eyes  
Broken inside_

_Her feelings she hides  
Her dreams she can't find  
She's losing her mind  
She's falling behind_

_She can't find her place  
She's losing her faith  
She's falling from grace  
She's all over the place, yeah_

_She wants to go home  
But nobody's home  
That's where she lies  
Broken inside_

_With no place to go  
No place to go  
To dry her eyes  
Broken inside_

_She's lost inside, lost inside  
Oh oh  
She's lost inside, lost inside  
Oh oh, oh_

Well I'm crying. Sam has officially seen me cry. He should run away, I look hideous when I cry. But Santana's performance was just so beautiful and raw that I couldn't hold it in. The tears are running freely now and I don't even care. I'm just too consumed within her performance that I can only feel Sam cuddling me and as far as I'm concerned, nobody else is even in the room, even though I know that there's a full audience of people watching her bear her soul. Santana's crying too, and as much as I want to go up and console her, I have to stay put to keep the show in order.

Finn's up next and to be honest, I am going to drown out his performance anyway. If it's about Rachel or Quinn, I might just throw something at him. He doesn't deserve this happiness, not when decent people are struggling.

**I'm With You by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Finn Hudson**

**FINN: **_I'm standing on the bridge  
I'm waitin' in the dark  
I thought that you'd be here by now  
There's nothing but the rain  
No footsteps on the ground  
I'm listening but there's no sound_

_Isn't anyone tryin' to find me?  
Won't somebody come take me home?  
It's a damn cold night  
I'm tryin' to figure out this life  
Won't you, take me by the hand?  
Take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are  
But I, I'm with you  
I'm with you  
Hmm hmm hmm_

_I'm looking for a place  
I'm searching for a face  
Is anybody here I know?  
'Cause nothing's going right  
And everything's a mess  
And no one likes to be alone_

_Isn't anyone tryin' to find me?  
Won't somebody come take me home?  
It's a damn cold night  
I try to figure out this life  
Won't you, take me by the hand?  
Take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are  
But I, I'm with you  
I'm with you  
Yeah yeah_

_Oh, why is everything so confusing?  
Maybe I'm just out of my mind  
Yeah, yea eee yeah, yea eee yeah  
Yea yee yeah, yea eee yeah, yeah_

_It's a damn cold night  
Tryin' to figure out this life  
Won't you, take me by the hand?  
Take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are  
But I, I'm with you, yeah  
I'm with you, yeah_

_Take me by the hand  
Take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are  
But I, I'm with you, yeah  
I'm with you, yeah_

_Take me by the hand  
Take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are  
But I, I'm with you, oh  
I'm with you  
I'm with you_

What the _fuck_ was that all about? Who the fuck was that little bastard even singing to? Rachel? Quinn? Who the fuck knows anymore? I don't care enough to keep track of the fucking love dodecahedron that has formed within the Glee Club. I do care that Sam has slipped out of my grasp to get ready for his performance somewhere within Finn's performance. I feel him leave me, but I don't comment.

"Hello, I'm Sam Evans. I'm singing this song for my special someone. I've recently discovered someone that I didn't think I could ever find. My heart now belongs to him for as long as he'll keep it. Kurt Hummel, this is for you and only you."

**Fall To Pieces by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Sam Evans **

**SAM: **_I looked away  
Then I looked back at you  
You tried to say  
The things that you can't undo_

_If I had my way  
I'd never get over you  
But today's the day  
I pray that we make it through_

_Make it through the fall  
Make it through it all_

_And I don't wanna fall to pieces  
I just wanna sit and stare at you  
I don't wanna talk about it  
And I don't want a conversation  
I just wanna cry in front of you_

_I don't wanna talk about it  
'Cause I'm in love with you_

_You're the only one  
I'd be with 'til the end  
When I come undone  
You bring me back again_

_Back under the stars  
Back into your arms_

_And I don't wanna fall to pieces  
I just wanna sit and stare at you  
I don't wanna talk about it  
And I don't want a conversation  
I just wanna cry in front of you_

_I don't wanna talk about it  
'Cause I'm in love with you_

_Wanna know who you are?  
Wanna know where to start?  
I wanna know what this means_

_Wanna know how you feel?  
Wanna know what is real?  
I wanna know everything, everything_

_I don't wanna fall to pieces  
I just wanna sit and stare at you  
I don't wanna talk about it  
And I don't want a conversation  
I just wanna cry in front of you_

_I don't wanna talk about it  
And I don't wanna fall to pieces  
I just wanna sit and stare at you  
I don't wanna talk about it  
And I don't want a conversation  
I just wanna cry in front of you  
And I don't wanna talk about it_

_'Cause I'm in love with you, I'm in love with you  
'Cause I'm in love with you, I'm in love with you  
I'm in love with you_

If this is Sam's method of telling me that he loves me, I love it. It's so damn cute and I hope my song will complement his and tell him the same message. As I'm pondering whether or not to blow my nose during the silence, Matt comes onto the stage and prepares to sing (like Mike, for the first time, it seems).

"Can Matt sing?" I sniffle, leaning over to Tina. She just nods again. I see her hand clasping Mike's. Oh. That says a lot. That's actually really cute.

**Who Knows? By Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Matt Rutherford**

**MATT: **_Yeah, yeah  
Yeah, yeah, yeah  
Yeah, yeah, yeah_

_Why do you look so familiar?  
I could swear that I  
Have seen your face before  
I think I like the way you seem sincere  
I think I'd like to get  
To know you a little bit more_

_I think there's something more  
Life's worth living for_

_Who knows what could happen?  
Do what you do  
Just keep on laughing  
One thing's true  
There's always a brand new day  
I'm gonna live today like it's my last day_

_Yeah, yeah  
Yeah, yeah, yeah  
Yeah, yeah, yeah_

_How do you always have an opinion?  
And how do you always find  
The best way to compromise?  
We don't need to have a reason  
We don't need anything  
We're just wasting time_

_I think there's something more  
Life's worth living for_

_Who knows what could happen?  
Do what you do  
Just keep on laughing  
One thing's true  
There's always a brand new day_

_Who knows what could happen?  
Do what you do  
Just keep on laughing  
One thing's true  
There's always a brand new day  
I'm gonna live today like it's my last day_

_Find yourself  
'Cause I can't find you  
Be yourself  
Who are you?  
Find yourself  
'Cause I can't find you  
Be yourself  
Who are you?_

_Who knows what could happen?  
Do what you do  
Just keep on laughing  
One thing's true  
There's always a brand new day_

_So you go make it happen  
Do your best  
Just keep on laughing  
I'm telling you  
There's always a brand new day_

_Who knows what could happen?  
Do what you do  
Just keep on laughing  
One thing's true  
There's always a brand new day  
I'm gonna live today like it's my last day_

He can sing. He can definitely sing well. He's great, but I don't think he's quite at the standard of Mike just yet. With training, he could go places.

I listen for backstage as I prepare for the closing number. I know this song. I love this song. I'm living this song. Time to give an amazing performance. My heart skips a beat as it feels like I'm being reacquainted with a long lost love of performing. It's so weird I just know that I belong on the stage.

"Hello, I'm Kurt Hummel, and as you saw earlier, Sam Evans dedicated his song selection to me. So I'm going to do the same to him with the hope that he listens to every single word."

**Things I'll Never Say by Avril Lavigne  
Sung by Kurt Hummel**

**KURT: **_I'm tuggin' at my hair, I'm pullin' at my clothes  
I'm tryin' to keep my cool, I know it shows  
I'm starin' at my feet, my cheeks are turnin' red  
I'm searchin' for the words inside my head_

_I'm feelin' nervous  
Tryin' to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it  
You're worth it, yeah_

_If I could say what I want to say  
I say I wanna blow you away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?_

_If I could say what I want to see  
I want to see you go down on one knee  
Marry me today  
Guess I'm wishin' my life away  
With these things I'll never say_

_It don't do me any good, it's just a waste of time  
What use is it to you what's on my mind?  
If it ain't comin' out, we're not goin' anywhere  
So why can't I just tell you that I care?_

_'Cause I'm feelin' nervous  
Tryin' to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it  
You're worth it, yeah_

_If I could say what I want to say  
I say I wanna blow you away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?_

_If I could say what I want to see  
I want to see you go down on one knee  
Marry me today  
Yes, I'm wishing my life away  
And these things I'll never say_

_What is wrong with my tongue?  
These words keep slippin' away  
I stutter, I stumble  
Like I've got nothin' to say_

_'Cause I'm feelin' nervous  
Tryin' to be so perfect  
'Cause I know you're worth it  
You're worth it, yeah_

_Yes, I'm wishing my life away  
But these things I'll never say_

_If I could say what I want to say  
I say I wanna blow you away  
Be with you every night  
Am I squeezing you too tight?_

_If I could say what I want to see  
I want to see you go down on one knee  
Marry me today  
Yes, I'm wishing my life away  
But these things I'll never say  
These things I'll never say_

I finish my song and relish the applause and-oh my god a standing ovation! I mean I know I'm great but I didn't realise I was _that_ great performing my song! I breathe for standing ovations, they are my favourite thing in the entire world.

As Mr Schuester wraps things up, we all meet backstage, discussing each other's performances (well, Rachel's critiquing them as usual) and talking to the ones we dedicated them too. I'm wrapped around Sam as he kisses me fiercely.

"I'm in love with you, Kurt." Sam says, pecking my lips one final time.

"I'm in love with you too. Always and forever. I know it's not been long at all, just a few weeks, but I can safely say that I will never feel what I feel for you again. Your heart is mine and I don't plan on letting it go anytime soon."

"Look after it. I'll treasure yours like the gem that you are."

OH MY GAGA MY HEART IS ABOUT TO FAIL.

I detangle myself from Sam and find Santana, just finishing hugging Brittany. I give her a strong hug, but not crushing her.

"I love you, Santana. You're family to me now and that's forever. Your home is with me and my dad. Those people you use d to call parents don't mean anything. They're just vindictive, spiteful people and don't deserve a wonderful, beautiful daughter like you." I kiss her forehead and squeeze her hand.

"Thank you." She whispers. That's all she can manage before she falls apart on my shoulder. I let her cry, because sometimes we all need to let out the feelings we've been bottling up. God knows I do. I have all this anger towards Finn and no way of expressing it. I try to channel it into my performances, but it doesn't always satisfy me. I have to think of something.

I hug Tina, Mike, Quinn, Brittany and surprisingly Rachel, commending them on their performances, especially Quinn's. She really does have a beautiful voice, but it's been silenced by Rachel's wail. Something needs to change around here and I won't stop until it does.

* * *

**Author's Note: So this is like REALLY long. 25 pages in my Microsoft Word document. Damn. Anyway, most of it is just song lyrics, so feel free to skip them, but to gain the full effect as always, I think you should listen to them if you haven't heard them already. Oh, over 8000 words. Hot. Damn. Anyway, the next chapter will contain a couple of songs as it's the auditions for Regionals solos. I already know who has what parts, but I don't know about songs for the setlist yet. Stick around for the next chapter, guys! And review! You're all fabulous! **


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